I’m almost in The New. I’m in Baton Rouge and my bus doesn’t leave until five something. It’s only one thirty now.

Every time I come here I think about Faith. She doesn’t have any children as far as I know. I mean why wouldn’t she put it on Facebook if she does. I guess it’s not too late. I can still have more, In sha Allah. Maybe she can too. She’s a career woman. I thought I was too. I never pictured myself a homemaker in a million years. I wanted to be a news anchor. And a talk show host. Those type of women don’t have successful families – like Oprah. They try to do it all but can’t. Trying to be “Superwoman.” But that’s not superwoman. Superwoman saves people from harm. They are trying to do it all. It’s so stupid. But that is how the devil has made us. I almost cry thinking about my poor Sisters. They work all day and then come home and try to do the housework they should have been doing all day. It’s crazy. They spend their whole lives like that. Even older Sisters (an older Sister) told me that’s the way it’s supposed to be. We are women too. White women with class don’t live like that. It’s the lower class who think they are supposed to be “equal” with men. Refined women know we are supposed to rear our husband’s children and take care of him and the home he provides for us. These feminists think there’s something wrong with that. They want to be men. They want to do the things men are supposed to do. Like work outside of the home with strange men. I don’t. I’m perfectly happy being a woman and doing the things I was created to do in the home. Baking cookies is fulfilling. Sewing draperies is fulfilling. Wiping noses and making therapeutic tea is fulfilling.

I hate seeing little Black babies with runny noses. They’re not eating right. Too much mucous and it’s coming out. I NEVER remember Hakim having a runny nose. Not even once. He got sick once but he told me he needed some fruit, so I got it and he felt better instantly.

I got to go to the grocery store in Houston. It was on it’s last leg so I helped kill it.

I can’t believe I’m in this Greyhound station for another three hours and nobody’s here but some dirty devil men.

I think I’m gonna take a nap.

I love you I love you I love You I love You I Love You I Love You I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you okay, I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you.

I can’t remember the last time I told you. Please don’t ever think I’m going to stop loving you. I’m not. I will love you until I take my last breath. I thought about saying until my heart stops beating but they have machines to keep your heart beating. I think when you can’t breathe anymore that’s it. So until I am no longer able to breathe in the atom of life, I will love you, Amad-Jamal Allah.

I can’t bring myself to attach the slave name to you. I was just reading the Messenger’s teaching on him. He called him an outcast or something bad like that. And he said all the other outcasts boosted his authority and then he made you his slave. SMH. Well the Messenger (PBUH) didn’t say the part about making you his slave but he did.

I HATED how proud you sounded when you told the police your name. Maybe you were happy because you thought they were going to take care of me in your stead. Idk I don’t even wanna think about it. I just can’t wait to see you again. Soon come, In sha Allah.