Captain’s Log عشرة

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم



February 3, 2017

8:44 A.M.A.D. – Jamal

Al Hamdulillah!!!

All Praises Are Due To Allah, Master Fard Muhammad,
To Whom Be Praised FOREVER!!!

As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum Beloved And Beautiful Asiatic Black Bebies!

I feel like I’m in New Orleans already!

You know what?

I used to say “Nawlins” because I thought that’s how people from New Orleans say it.
I was at the Women’s (Or rather Bull-dyke and Trannies :/ ) Center yesterday and these Sisters were reading my bag and one of them said, “Nawlins” like I used to. Apparently I wasn’t the only one who thought they say that.

I think New Orleanians got tired of people mocking them and started saying New Orleans, or New Or-le-ins, or New Orlins, but I have NEVER heard anyone say “Nawlins” I’ve heard “Rawlins” 😛 but never “Nawlins” 😉

I got my ticket and I’m sitting here thinking about Zawji, listening to Musiq Soulchild and it made me feel like writing.

It’s so strange but the Holy Qur’an says, “We plan and Allah Plans. Surely, Allah is the BEST OF PLANNERS.”

It is so true.

I had this schedule of all the things I wanted to do today,


When I woke up this morning, nothing went according to MY plan.

But everything Went according to ALLAH’S PLAN.

And, I must admit

I love HIS Plan.

I just wish He Would Tell Me BEFOREHAND.

I mean

Surprises are nice


He ALWAYS makes me sad first

Or mad

Or stressed.

I met this guy named Mr. Wright in the nineties,

On one of my adventures.

We were at Cal State Long Beach at nighttime for some reason,

And we were having a good time.

He must’ve been Zawji’s Doppel because he danced the whole night.

I didn’t know anything about Doppels back then.







I mean, his NAME was Mr. Wright (Right).

I told him I should call my mom and tell her I met Mr. Right. LOL

He ended up calling HIS mom and letting me talk to her.

That was flattering.

Guess I was wifey material.

Anyway, he was talking about how Christmas is so awesome because it’s a surprise. I wish I could remember exactly what he said because I agreed. Although, Christmas as a practice is evil as Hell. But I think about how I felt when he told me something like, you have to go through some pain or patience, before you get to the good reward.

I think that is just in this world.

In the Hereafter, In Sha Allah, it won’t be like this.

We Can Just Get Straight To The Good Part.

And Live Happily Ever After.

With no bad parts.

That’s what I’m expecting.

In this world, we think there has to be some type of antagonism.

But Islam is not that.


I started not to post this because they don’t have on shirts


MC Hammer was NOT an MC.

He couldn’t rap for nothing.

Although I did like one line he said.

But he could dance his behind off.

I remember in the nineties I had one of the best days of my life.

Boys 2 Men, Jodeci and MC Hammer were having a show at The Forum.

So, me and my cousins went to see Boyz 2 Men at some press thingie they had earlier in the day, at the Hard Rock in the Beverly Center. I had a camera and used up the whole roll.

Who knew we would be face to face with Jodeci later?

The radio station had announced they were having some secret location joint, but I guess Allah Told me where it was going to be because we went and there they were.

That was when I almost got in the limo with Dalvin. LOL

It reminds me of that video with Aretha Franklin “A Rose is Still A Rose” where the Sister left her friends to roll off with Tip.

I didn’t go though.

I looked at my friends.

Then I looked at him sitting there.



I Was In The Limo Door Halfway In…

He Was Fine As Hell


I just felt like a hoe.

There are more important things in life than









I haven’t seen this video in a few years and it reminds me so much of myself.

I am so thankful for Allah and Islam.

Otherwise, I would still be out there trying to replace Zawji.

Promiscuous and ending up used up;




Al Hamdulillah!

Sisters, don’t give a man your most valuable possession until after he’s proven he deserves it by marrying you first.

Even still, some men will just marry you to get it or for reasons other than love.


And Ask Allah

If he is your Zawji.


Even if you don’t like the answer.

I just told you

He hurts you sometimes first.

Then surprises you with something better than you could have ever dreamed!!!



So, I’m sitting in the bus station bawling.

I don’t even try anymore.

To hide my tears.

They’re just going to have to see my crying.

I just don’t look to see if anybody is watching


Let them flow.

So, when we saw Jodeci, K-Ci walked right in front of us singing TLC’s “Baby, Baby, Baby” right along with the music they were playing –

I thought that was kinda cool.

He’s singing somebody else’s song. And a girl group!

So anyway,


Like he was TRYING to get our attention,

And I really regretted wasting all my film on Boyz 2 Men who were a little distance away on stage.

I could’ve taken a picture WITH him. :/

Oh yeah,

After the Boyz 2 Men press conference

Why did we follow them when they got in the car? LOL

They drove for a little while, then I guess they realized we were following them, so they pulled into this empty parking lot and we followed them right on in.

Then they stopped and their bodyguard got out the car and came up to my window and told me to stop following them, real mean like.


So, we went to the Jodeci thingie.

Then we got into a car accident but nobody was hurt.

I think one of my cousins got paid.

But I didn’t want to go to therapy.

So I didn’t get any money.



We went on to the forum and saw both groups and MC Hammer.

I had seen Boyz 2 Men before

But that’s another story… 😛

I used to really like them.

I had this cassette tape of the “Motownphilly” single

And it had “snippets” LOL

Of songs from the whole album.

I used to wear that thing OUT!

I even made a plaid shorts outfit with a matching tie like they used to wear.


First outfit I ever made myself!

I used to wear it with a long-sleeved, button-down denim

And you couldn’t tell me nothing.


I thought I was so cute.

You could tell me a lot now.

Like how women shouldn’t wear anything masculine –

Like button down shirts


Definitely not TIES!


We Should Try To Be As Feminine As Possible!

In skirts and dresses and delicate jewelry,

Ribbons and bows and pink stuff.

Allahu Akbar

For The Honourable Elijah Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him)

And The M.G.T. & G.C.C!



Hammer put on a bomb show.

He can’t rap but he can entertain so I’m not that mad.

I have higher standards now.

You can’t distract me with music and dancing.

I listen for vocal ability.


Remember that dancer with the triangle haircut? LOL

Let me find that Addams family video.

We used to wear that video into the ground on the strength of his dancing.

At the show he was up on a riser by himself and I didn’t even see Hammer because I was too busy watching him.

We were far away which was unusual for me, but still had a great time.

I’m trying to remember if TLC was on the lineup too.

I don’t pay any attention to the females. LOL

This was before I started doing my show.

But, we used to have so much fun.

I had so much fun in my twenties that if I never have fun another day in my life

I’m Gucci.

Okay, that Addams family video takes too long if there is a good part.

This one is better.

So, I guess he knew he wasn’t an emcee because he dropped that part of his name and just started going by Hammer.

Good lookin’, Kid.

So, I guess I’m just gonna chill until it’s time for my bus to ship out.

This time I’m going to The French Quarter instead of the regular Greyhound station.

Should make for an interesting trip.

I was able to book a room at the Guest House.

It cost more than I was expecting, but Zawji told me not to be niggardly. So, I went ahead and booked it.

It feels good knowing I’ll have a place to stay and freshen up and thank Allah for my safe arrival.

It always rains when I leave or arrive in L.A.

I think I make her emotional.

One time when I arrived, she was raining. I was sad expecting sunny skies, but I think she was happy for me to come home.

Now she’s crying because I’m leaving.

I kinda wanted to go to the beach one more time before I left but Zawji wants me to leave wanting more.

I heard that’s the mark of a good performer. Leave your audience wanting more.

I used to think that was unfair.

I want to leave them satiated.

But Zawji is the God, so I have to go along with Him, if I’m wise.

If I went to the beach yesterday or today, I wouldn’t be in a big hurry to come back.


I have NO IDEA how long I’m gonna be in the New


Anything that makes it easier to leave is welcome.

I NEVER want to leave New Orleans.

I have a pass for the Jazz Festival waiting for me, so

In Sha Allah

I’ll be there for that.

It would be nice to see The Roots again.

And they’re performing with Ursher. LOL

I like him now.

Even though I hate that “do your thing, girl” song he has telling his girl he doesn’t care if she’s a stripper. What kinda mess is that?

These young folks need some boundaries.

He has another song with some rapper, I forgot his name, Future or somebody, but I thought he was a girl when I saw the video. I don’t like that song either.

Let me think.

It’s “No Limit” with Young Thug.

In sha Allah, he’ll reign it in before he gets too far gone.

I couldn’t even watch the video, I was so grossed out when he turned around and I saw he was a man.


I hate that.

It happens in real life and never ceases to creep me out.

Men cut your hair.

Long hair and mustaches is the grossest thing in the world.


You gross me out.

There is nothing creepier than not knowing if a person is male or female.


Or thinking they’re female and then seeing he’s a male or vice versa.

America deserves everything coming to her for such abominations.

Our poor children are growing up confused.

I remember this little baby girl asked my son if he was a boy.

Her mother was a bulldyke and had her around all these freaks.

I wanted to cry for that poor baby.

😥 😥 😥 😥 😥

So back to the JazzFest…

I’m kinda sad about the Roots.

I liked when it was just Tariq, Ahmir, Hub and the guy on keys. Let me G him. BRB

Oh yeah, I remember – Kamal.

They all have Muslim names. Probably Hub too, although I don’t know his real name.

I wonder why he left the group.

He did seem to be A LOT older than the rest of them.

I hope he’s not sick or nothing.

I also hope it wasn’t creative differences.

Although, I wouldn’t be surprised.

They have changed a lot since they used to be at the House of Blues every month.

They have horns now, which, surfacely, looks like a good thing.

Christian McBride told me he used to play bass with them in High School.

I guess before they got Hub.

I miss him and his licorice stick.

I hope he’s okay.

Anyway, they’re like the O/G Hip-Hop band.

Now, it seems more emcees are incorporating live bands into their shows.

I love acoustic.

Drum machines have no soul.

It’s not the same.

Pushing buttons… :/ LIVE?

I play drums a little and there’s no feeling in the world like hitting the drum or a cymbal.

It communicates your emotion through sound.

Using a drum machine instead of drums is like pushing a button on the side of your steering wheel for your horn instead of the big thingie in the middle.

You can’t BANG down on it!!!

Or like pushing a button to hang up the phone as opposed to slamming the receiver down.

You can’t put your HEART into it.

I like acoustic pianos better than electric.

You can put feeling into an acoustic piano depending on how you play it.

With electric pianos all the notes sound the same.

I was talking with this musician about combination acoustic/electric pianos like they have guitars.

I would like the pre-recorded beats and ability to record like they have on electric pianos but with the option to play acoustic to get that wonderful sound and feeling.

Let me G it. BRB

Okay, they’re called “Hybrid Pianos


I’ve seen them before

I just didn’t know what they were.

Hakim took a piano class and that was they type of pianos they had.

They looked really cool.

Like electric keyboards with the body of a little upright.

They sound pretty good.

But a real acoustic is better.

I have given up on playing the piano at the U.

At least for now. 😉

They made me feel like Biz.

Making me beg to get on the piano and play that day.

I know they just want me to play and sing to some spook that doesn’t exist and his fake son,


I would rather not play than do that.

People think music is the most important thing in the world.


It’s not.

There are a lot more important things,

Like Allah and Family Love.

Then comes music.

They keep hoping I’ll sell out.



It’s so funny.

People talk about salvation all the time


I ask them

Salvation from WHAT?

They never know or they’ll say salvation from sin.

And, I don’t even have to say anything because they know that to be saved from sin all you have to do is stop sinning. LOL

Oh My Goodness!

I was just looking for a better picture of Dalvin.

I wanted one closer to the image I have in my mind of him sitting in the limo.

Before, when I G’d it, him and T-Boz came up but I didn’t know they got Married!

She always marries guys I like. LOL

Mack Dime and Dalvin.

Pepa too.

I wonder if they’re my doppels.

Okay, I just saw, they didn’t get married.

The picture I saw is from Jodeci’s “Love you for life” video.

I saw so many things wrong with that wedding.

First, the argument before they even get married.

I feel like if you’re arguing, you don’t need to get married.

You can disagree and say it can’t be done


Me and Zawji have never had an argument and we’ve been in love since 1979.

11:00 A.M.A.D. – Jamal

Okay, we’re into the P.M.


My Departure Time is Nearing.

I’m starting to feel some kinda way.

I think I’m actually going to miss Skid Row.

There’s something about the familiarity.

The every day sameness.

The recognition of faces that I used to know after I’ve seen them ten times.


Oh, THAT’s So and So!

That’s kinda fun.

I’m starting to miss the beach already.

I remember the first time I came to New Orleans.

I went to sleep one night thinking I would go to the beach the next day.

Then I remembered I was in New Orleans.

I almost had a heart attack.

I’m going to miss the mountains too.

That was hard getting used to.

When you grow up in L.A.,

You kinda take it for granted that they’re always there

In the background.

That took a while to admit.

They’re no mountains in New Orleans.

There are not even any hills.

I’m still coming to grips with that.

In Sha Allah, I’ll be too preoccupied with the music to miss them.


I’ve decided not to post this until my bus has left.

I don’t want anybody to know where I am.

I mean.

I don’t fear America


I’m not stupid either.

3:52 p.m.

I just saw the cutest little bad Black boy.

He was absolutely adorable.

I was just watching him.

First he went in between the vending machines.


Then he climbed onto the shelves.


He started hitting this old white lady.

I was cracking up.

She was like,

“Dont…. hit… me!”

Then he hit her again.


Then she raised her hand and said,

“Don’t… hit… me!”

He put his little purple balloon animal in his mouth and hit her again.

Then she started looking around for security!


He has to be about three…

Oh, he just took this blind lady’s walking cane.


Man, gotta love Black boys…

He is outta control.

Mom is young and talking on her cell phone.

I would reprimand him, but he’s just so cute.

So much


He is all over the place.

Okay, Mom is off the phone, walking him around.

Looks like she might be taking him to get a snack.

Gotta luh da kids…

5:07 p.m.

I’m sitting next to my son, Hakim’s, doppel.

I guess he had to see me or let me see him before I left.


5:28 p.m.

Uh-oh, Bad Little Black Boy lost his mom.

He’s running around crying.

I got him.

Mommy heard him crying.


5:37 p.m.


Bad little Black Boy’s lost again.

I got him.

Somebody gave him a dollar and he’s talking about buying some cookies.

He told me his name’s Michael and he’s TWO!!!

I told Mommy, this can be a dangerous place for children.

Someone might snatch him up.

She said, He Keeps Running Off.


I told him,

“You don’t go anywhere you can’t see Mommy!”



5:45 p.m.

I saw Acey downtown when I first got back to L.A.

He was standing outside this cafe/bar

And said,

“Girl, lemme get in that coat with you!”

Not even, “Hey Cheryce, how you been?”

Just came at me like I was some hooker.

So disrespectful.

I acted like I didn’t know him and kept on walking.

I used to have a big crush on him back in the day.

He didn’t have time for me then.

I used to see him when we took our children to the Drum Workshop.

He started liking me then.

When Islam started making me beautiful.

I said, “As-Salaam-Alaikum”

And he acted like he didn’t know what to say.

And he started his “theme music” with the same words.

I hate when people try to commercialize off of Islam.

Allah Will Pay Them Back Their Mockery.

Time Makes All Things Manifest.

He had a show with Zawji back in 2007.

Zawji wanted me to come


That was when I had to be in the house before Sunset and I didn’t go anywhere without Hakim, who was four at the time.

I stopped liking Acey and all other men when Allah Revealed Zawji as my Zawji.

I’m so glad I didn’t hook up with him EVER.

I don’t know what he wants from me.

Whatever it is,

I can’t give it.

That ship has sailed.

I wish I could do the sign.

Let me see if I can make a video.

I’m so technologically ahead of technology.


I always have things I imagine that they haven’t come up with yet.

At least not on my hardware.

I want to make a live video on my blog


Record video on my laptop.

My iphone only works when she wants to.

Maybe I can find it online.


And I can’t remember where I learned it.

Oh well.

It feels weird though.

At first it felt good.

Knowing someone I used to like wants me now.

But now it’s kinda annoying because he won’t leave me alone.

A lot of Brothers look at me as a challenge.

No one has been successful in stealing my heart.

They don’t understand

BUT they will.

I haven’t seen Batman in weeks.

I deliberately went where he usually opens his store yesterday

And he was nowhere to be found.

This was his Doppel’s second time.

 He took what he learned the first time and came back stronger.

But I’m stronger too.

Stronger than him.

He didn’t even get to first base this time.

Struck out in two swings.


This is a different ball game.

6:27 p.m.

So, why did I go to the store to get some A.J. and some mixed fresh fruit and my ATM Debit card was handed back to me?

I was like, “Whuh?

Went to check my balance and found out that they changed my check amount to the New Orleans rate.

So, I’m going to New Orleans flat broke!

But I’m going!!!

Allahu Akbar!!!

As soon as I come back to L.A., they change my check.


But I guess since I’m getting New Orleans rate, I might as well live in New Orleans.


I don’t know what I’m going to do about my dentist appointment.

I was kind of reluctant to go in the first place

Considering it was a dentist who messed my teeth up in the first place!

8:25 p.m.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

I just got to play with the sweetest little girls.

Kimora about 2 and Brooklyn about one.

Kimora is so smart. All she wanted to do was listen to the ABC song on my laptop

And Brooklyn was singing right along.

These generation whatever Moms are just too much.

Always on the phone…

But their babies know how to get their attention!

I got to play Mary Poppins and teach letters and numbers to two beautiful Black Baby girls, so Mommy could talk to her friends on the phone.

I wish I could have taken the phone with me when I was younger!

We had to get off if we had to leave.

‘Member that?


Allahu Akbar!

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

Okay, my bus is leaving in about an hour and I’m starting to feel separation anxiety at the thought of being so far away from Zawji.

But he can come to New Orleans anytime he wants.


There’s no need to trip.

He could be anywhere in the world.

Coming to New Orleans is nothing.

It’s part of the continental United States.

I’m taking a bus!

I could probably walk if I really wanted to.

Forrest Gump it.

If he can run I can walk.

I’m in no hurry.

Somebody told me where to go to hitch a ride with truckers too.

So, if I know how to get somewhere


Being the God of the Universe.

And I did what he brought me out here to do.

– Get his phone number.

So, I can call or text him anytime I need to.

That is, when my iphone is working…

All I wanna say is, “I’m sorry.”

But I want to say it to his face.

Something gets lost in e-mails, texts, IMs and telephone calls.

I’m so sad.

It’s emotional


I don’t think I’m gonna cry though.

At least not about leaving.

I’m just glad I’m not at that shelter.


The chaplain started coming in at night

Calling himself praying for us.

I would suddenly have an uncontrollable coughing fit

That would only last the duration of his prayer

And then miraculously disappear.

It’s a miracle!




 ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

February 4, 2017

5:35 A.M.A.D. – Jamal

SisterCaptain’s Log ٧

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم



January 31, 2017

10:22 A.M.A.D.-Jamal 😉

I remember when my daughter was little, I found out she was upset because she had to wait until THE LAST DAY IN MAY for her birthday.

I felt guilty because I let my doctor induce my labour. 😥

If I had not, she would have been born in June like most of my family. 😥

And probably earlier in the month… 😥

Sorry Pumpkin. 😥

I don’t think I ever told you that. But I’m like most old boring people…. Telling the same stories over and over and over and over and over and over…. 😉

My Grandmother told me not to let my doctor induce my labour.

But girls are bigger to carry than boys and to put it quite frankly, not trying to excuse my behaviour, but I felt like a “beached whale” and was tired of being pregnant. :/

Maybe if my grandmother had told me “WHY” I shouldn’t let him induce my labour I would have listened and maybe wouldn’t have done it.

Now, I really regret it and would advise women to just let the baby come on naturally. Even if you’re “overdue” like I was. The Baby knows when it’s time to be born. Everything should happen when it’s supposed to. Especially something as important as a birth date and time. Science shouldn’t interfere. 

It could set off a chain of events that is hard to correct.

My daughter and I don’t even speak to each other now.

Maybe if I had let her be born when SHE wanted to be born, we would have a better relationship.

But only Allah knows.

My sister told me later that doctors just do that (schedule deliveries) so that they won’t have to get up if you go into labour in the middle of the night NATURALLY.

I feel like such a victim.

But my poor daughter has to go through the rest of her life waiting on THE LAST DAY IN MAY for her birthday. Sorry again, Sweet Pumpkin! 😦

We don’t celebrate any days in The Nation Of Islam anyway except SAVIOUR’S DAY (February 26th). But I didn’t start practicing Islam until she was 14. Wow! It doesn’t seem like she was that old. She’s almost 26 now. Unbelievable.

I still picture her as an adorable chubby little toddler. I can’t believe she’s old enough to marry and make me a grandmother!

When I was her age, I was already divorced, about to graduate college, working full time and raising a 5 year-old. I had had a nervous breakdown but at least I made it past 25.

At that time, it was a big deal (for the Brothers anyway) to live past 25.

Pac didn’t make it. 😥

Although I’ve heard some music that sounded like him if he put it out now.

No lie.

Blew my mind.

But, Michael Jackson puts out a new song every day to this day.

Low-key though…

Janet was better.

I read that when they did “Scream”

They were real competitive with each other.

I don’t believe that.

I remember watching the Jackson’s movie that Jermaine produced and it showed when Michael went solo that they were proud of him, not at all jealous. Also, I read the introduction to a J5 compilation written by Janet wherein she said how proud she was of her brothers growing up and how much she loved their music.

So, I think that competition thing is just media hype

Most people prefer girl singers though for some reason.

I think it’s something about the pitch of the female voice that’s more entertaining.

Some Muslims believe women are not supposed to sing publicly.

I don’t.

The Messenger (PBUH) did say we were not supposed to be singing filthy Love Songs though; tempting men and whatnot.

I just sing to my Zawji

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

Mike was a biter too.

He bit his dances from Jeffrey Daniels (of Soul Train and Shalimar fame) and he bit the Moonwalk from some Breakers.

I wish more people knew.

I wonder if THEY knew he was stealing their moves.

That would be different.

But I feel deceived.

I thought Mikey came up with that stuff on his own.

I can’t stand biters.

Even if he did get clearance from them. What about your fans who think YOU came up with it?

It’s like Rakim penning “Summertime” for Willard, Jr.

When he sold it to him, he had to give up all rights and he may have been cool with that, but it’s DECEPTIVE.

I almost feel like singers and rappers should only sing songs that they’ve written.

Jazz singers and players will credit the songwriter before or after they perform a number but who knew Ice Cube wrote all of NWA’s songs before the movie?

Unless you buy the album (but who buys albums nowadays) you may never know who wrote a song. I guess you can Google it. But even still people lie.

A journalist asked RA if he wrote Summertime and stood there and lied straight through his teeth.

Look how Flav looks at him

That money can be a big incentive.

 But that’s hard for me to accept, especially being a writer.

Biters take credit for somebody else’s creativity.

It’s deceptive.

I mean, I don’t know. The whole thing is confusing.

It almost makes me never want to sing or play music publicly again.

I heard this Brother sing a song in my style and it just shut me up.

I never even knew I had a style until I heard him. LOL

It was when I used to go to Day Therapy and they would pick us up from L.A. and take us up to the mountains. So we were in the car about three hours every day and he had been listening to me sing for about a week and then one day he started singing sounding JUST LIKE ME.

It really opened my eyes.

I didn’t know I had a sound that was imitatable. LOL (making up words again 😉 ) But there he was. Singing just like me.

It made me more conscious about who I sing around, especially over an extended period of time.

I remember once I was in the hospital and I drew this picture of some flowers and left it in the day room with the other pictures other people had drawn and/or colored.

Then, one day in Art Therapy, this she-devil starts talking about she was going to draw a picture.

Why did she draw the exact same pictures of flowers I had drawn.

I was pissed.

I said, “You stole that from me!” and went to get my picture.

Then, like a real devil, SHE GOT MAD and knocked the paint water all over my picture.

I was stunned.

I mean, how you gonna get mad at ME for biting MY style.


I know she was just mad because I called her out.

But I didn’t tell her to bite.


I guess when you put your art out there, you leave it open for someone to bite. Truthfully, she didn’t know that it was me who had drawn the picture, so I shouldn’t take it personally. But the fact that she announced that she was going to draw a picture, and then drew MY picture like she had come up with the concept, was too much for me.

Anyway, I said all that to say, that this is THE LAST DAY IN JANUARY

And it feels like it.

This morning was so-so.

Kinda cool, kinda not so cool.

I get sick and tired of biters trying to be close to me, trying to steal my shine.

I just move.

Then they sit in my seat.


First breakfast was aight, I got to drink some milk.

Second breakfast we had Cream of Wheat, which I was so thankful was not grits.


A while ago, there was this big debate on Facebook about whether grits were better with sugar or with salt. :/ Either way they are too hard on the digestive system for your good health. Do not eat them at all.

I had them one time when I was little. We used to pick up this Brother for school and every morning he would get in the car with a mouthful of grits. Thankfully, my mother never prepared grits for us. Well, one morning, I happened to go inside and I tasted them for myself. I almost threw up. Literaturely. I gagged on them.

I’ve come to learn that most foods that I don’t like are not good for you anyway. Like grits. And other foods that I initially didn’t like, but came to like because it was all I was given or made myself like because everybody else liked: peanut butter, greens, black-eyed peas, ham, lobster, MEAT, cornbread, pasta… None of these foods prolong life, rather they take life away.



We are one month into 2017. It is so funny how fast time flies. I’m still getting used to the idea of being in 2017. Next year, I will have been out of High School 30 YEARS!


I feel like I’m STILL in High School!!!



Seriously though.

Admittedly, I’m a year younger than most of the people I graduated with because I started school when I was four. I told you my mother never loved me. She just wanted me out of the house. But I’m younger than people who graduated AFTER me. It’s crazy.

I used to console myself about being younger than everybody, by telling them, “When you’re 30, I’ll still be 29!” LOL

Now, we’re pushing 50!

Al Hamdulillah!

So thankful to be here. Healthy and Happy!

With so much of my life ahead of me.

My children are growing up but I can still have another one, In sha Allah!
(If it Pleases Allah)

I can’t believe Makay-kay’s going to be 18!

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

It seems like yesterday, Zawji was holding and kissing her in his arms…

While I was miserable wanting to hold and kiss her too


Her mother was oblivious to what was going on

Preoccupied with my camera.

I wanted her to go nurse our baby.

I did it instead.

You know I’m a Jersey Cow!

I always have milk.

If anyone is having trouble producing milk,

Call me (213)378-6798.

I’ll just charge you Room & Board

And if you are not Black

Don’t waste my time.

Those days are over.


❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

I’m thrilled because I didn’t hear the formerly sick Sister cough


Last Night.


If you have a dry cough/wet cough, whether it’s asthma, pneumonia, tuberculosis, yellow fever, leukemia, ANY COUGH, find some COLT’S FOOT. Click here if you missed the link yesterday.

You will have to take a walk or get out of the car, because it’s a weed and grows on the curb or in abandoned lots.

Now is a good time because it’s flu season and a lot of people have coughs. It also happens to be the time that it’s growing.

I would recommend not procrastinating because it’s growing in proportion to the rains and soon people are going to be mowing the lawns, so get it now.

Just heat up some water, put the LEAVES in the water. Let it seep for about three minutes and drink. You can sweeten it if you need to. I’ve never tasted it but sweetened it when I gave it to my son. The Sister yesterday drank it plain.

Zawji told me it worked before she even finished the remedy.

But I’m a Muslim Scientist and we have to have proof.

If anybody reprimands or belittles you for wanting proof of anything;


Especially Christians.

There is nothing wrong with wanting proof.

Tell them to show you Jesus if he is still alive.

They’ll say he’s up in the sky “on the right-hand side of the Father”

Then tell them to show you the father.


I can show you my God.

Show me yours.

Same thing with the Farrakhaners and others who say

Our Beloved Messenger (May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah Forever Be Upon Him)

Is still alive.

Tell them to show him to you.

I would LOVE it if the Messenger (PBUH) was still alive.

I would like to see and hear him in person.

Possibly shake his hand.

But I know he told us everything he had to say.

He even put it in a BOOK.

He taught until he was not able to teach anymore, so if he were still alive, he would still be teaching.

It makes me want to kill somebody almost when people try to tell me the Messenger (PBUH) is still alive.

It’s hard enough to accept that he is dead, then here you come trying to make me go through the pain of him dying again all over again!

Prove it.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

So, I’m just going to cool out until I get my check, then I can start all over.

This has been the longest month of my life.


I haven’t taken a shower or bath since I don’t know when.

But only some people smell me.

It’s like I can turn it on and off.

Not for real.

Zawji turns it on and off.

I told you I wasn’t taking one until I can take one with Zawji.

But, I’ma take one when I get my check.

Whichever comes first.

I was hoping someone would report me and I could take an emergency shower.

I hate waiting.

I hate begging.

And you have to do both to get a shower on Skid Row.


I’m just not gonna take one.

Ya’ll just gonna have to smell me.


It’s good though because people I don’t like will leave.

Or just have to suffer.

Sorry. Not sorry.

You shouldn’t love devils so much.

I’m realizing that my biggest beef with Black People is their love of devils.

That’s what it really boils down to.

They don’t like me because I don’t like devils.

I don’t like them because they love devils.

But We Are Living In the Greatest Day Of Separation.



No Skin Off My Nose.

You go with your people.

I will go with mine.

But don’t come looking for me,

When you realize that they are going to be destroyed.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

I can’t wait to get my check.

I’m Audi 5000, G


❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

So thankful I haven’t had to “prostitute” myself for a safe night off the street.

That’s literaturely how it feels.

He tells me he doesn’t want sex but has a condom and a bottle of KY on the dresser by the bed.

I can’t.

I slept on the floor two nights.

If I go back it’s going to be the third night and someone once told me that three nights is all he allows a woman to stay over after that she’s gotta go.

I feel like that third night he’s going to try and force me to do something I didn’t do the first two nights.

It’s scary.

I’m vulnerable being in some man’s home.

And I like ’em BIG & SCARY!!!


Anything could happen.

I don’t want to give him the slightest enticement.

He tried to say I let him kiss me.


Not after Buster or Edgar.

It took me 35 years to realize no one can ever replace my Zawji

And I don’t hide my endless love for him.

The first thing they see when they see me is his picture.

I tell them, when they inevitably ask,

He’s my “Zawji”

What does that mean?
“It means, he’s my EVERYTHING. My husband. My Best Friend. My Daddy. My Brother. My Son. My Pooh Bear. My Soan Papdi. My Bay. My BOO. My Soulmate. My Nafis. MY ZAWJI!”

I don’t know what they want from me.



Probably whatever they think I’ll give them, which is nothing.

I just use them for what I need.

They get to be seen with a beautiful lady.

Again. I’m not boasting. But I’m the one. Just ask me. It shall be done.

Don’t Bother To Compare.

I haven’t even seen Batman.

I guess he’s hiding out because everybody know he messed up a good thing.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

Somebody actually called me the day before yesterday.

I started not to answer because it’s ALWAYS bad news.

But it was a 213 number and my phone was actually working. SMH

I answered and

Said, “Mm-hmm”

 Nobody said anything.

So I said, “Yes” Like you’re really supposed to say when you answer the phone.

Muslims don’t say “Hello” when we answer the phone.

We don’t have time or patience for gossip. Just get to the reason why you called.

They still didn’t say anything. So I hung up.

They called back and I said “Yes”

Still no response.

When they called again I didn’t answer.

Yesterday, I called the number and it sounded like a Black girl, then Zawji switched matrices and it was an Asian lady.

I just hung up.

Why did they call again this morning?

I didn’t answer.

NOBODY ever calls me.

Me and my son use FB Messenger. Sometimes I use Gmail calling. But I never actually use the phone. Maybe for business.

Everybody knows not to call me. Because I don’t answer.

FB is your best bet. That is, if you’re not one of the 2000+ people I’ve blocked.

You can always leave a comment here too. No one will see it. I have to approve all comments first.

What you tryna hide anyway? 😉

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

I cannot WAIT to go back to the Jazz Playhouse

I need a fix.


I can’t remember the last time I had a hit of some LIVE JAZZ.

I think it was that “fundraiser” for the Candlelight with Mr. Henry with the smoky blue lights that I had to listen to outside because that mean lady who owns it doesn’t like me.

It was swingin’ tho!

Man! Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans???

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

3:21 P.M.

Captain’s Log ٤

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم



JANUARY 29, 2017 11:09 A.M.

I am anxiously awaiting the beginning of the month (February) (Happy Belated Birthday, Rakim!!!) so I can open the next chapter in my life.

I really want to go back to Orleans, but I feel like Allah Wants me to revisit the A. (A-Town Stompin’ 😉 ) I might stomp through and then go to OHHHHHH! I forgot about my appointment. If it wasn’t Mardi Gras season, I might risk it. But I think, no I KNOW there are going to be a lot of people going to NO for Mardi Gras. And they’ve probably already started parading, if it’s anything like last year.

I don’t want to miss my appointment. I’ve been trying to get one since last July! So cheah. NOLA it is. FIRST.

I didn’t go to the A, last year, or whenever (this month) I left NOLA. And, I’m really regretting it because I went to Taj Mahal when I got back to L.A., and they had Pineapple Body Oil but it was watered down! I am so disappointed because I recommend them all the time.

Muhammad’s cousin is in The A and he watered down his oils but I didn’t know Muhammad did it too! I called myself telling Muhammad on his cousin, pfffffff. Muhammad needs to be told on himself! He always looks guilty. But I’m telling Allah anyway.

I had a funny feeling about him from the beginning but still patronized him because he gave me free stuff. But I’m going to go back to DAWAH on 48th and Crenshaw or whereever they are. They have the WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD smelling good. Like when I went to New York. It smelled so good!

I should have known DAWAH on 48th and Crenshaw was better on the strength of their name. DAWAH means to teach people about Islam in Arabic and convert them to Islam. Proselytize, iow.

And Taj Mahal is named after some shrine to a leader of India’s wife! I wonder what it means in English. BRB

It translates to “CROWN MOTHER.”


DAWAH is much better. As far as the name goes. But they’re hypocrites and treated me funny the last time I went there.

Even the store in The A was prejudiced.

So, I don’t know.

I need a connect in Africa for my shea and cocoa butters and Arabia for my oils and incense so I can order my stuff direct. One day, In Sha Allah (If it Pleases Allah).


❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

I still want to go to 1520 Sedgwick, In sha Allah, but I’m sure Zawji wants to take me. Since we grew up together; with Hip-Hop as the background music. ❤ ❤ ❤ 😉

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

I am so thankful I did not have to sleep outside last night. Every night it’s like a spiritual battle trying to make sure I have a safe place to sleep. It is making your Sister Captain very humble.
Allahu Akbar! (Allah is the GREATEST!)

I even had the opportunity to have breakfast twice!

It’s sad how fat these women have gotten. Food is abundant on Skid Row. You have to be careful. I was gone about a year and some have picked up weight and aged so much you would think I was gone ten years.

And I wonder if they even know they’ve gained weight. Clothes are abundant also, so they may not even realize they’ve outgrown their old clothes….. Hmmmm…….

Anyway, I’m ghost next month, In Sha Allah. Allah sent me a reminder to be mindful of my food intake. It’s hard to eat one meal a day when you’re not sure when your next meal is going to be. I mean, I know I said food is plenteous but you never know what’s going to happen when you’re dependent on others who are not your Zawji. Even though, really I am dependent on Zawji. Everything I have is because of Him.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

So, for some reason I can’t remember, those three “See no evil, Hear no evil, Speak no evil” monkeys have been in my head.

I downloaded a picture but Allah Won’t Let me post it. I can’t find the one I really wanted and you’ve all seen them anyway.

The first one is covering his eyes, the second one has his index fingers in his ears, the third is covering his mouth.

I bet you didn’t know there’s a fourth.

He’s covering his private parts and it symbolizes “DO no evil.”




They’re called “The Four Wise Monkeys.” 

I used to be embarrassed when I saw them. Thinking they had something to be ashamed of. Like they were embarrassed because they had done something wrong, but in actuality, it’s the exact opposite.

They are trying NOT to even see, hear, say or DO anything wrong!!!

America corrupts everything and tries to change good into bad.

I could not believe some of the things that came up when I Googled them.

You will have to do that yourself, if you want to find out, because I am not going to entertain it here!!!

     BOTTOM LINE     

Our Beloved Messenger (May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah Forever Be Upon Him Taught us to “Cast Your Eyes In ANOTHER DIRECTION.

The music nowadays is filthy. Don’t listen to it.

Gossip is one of the worst things you can do.
I hate it.

Someone once told me they had heard I was in the alley smoking crack! I can laugh about it now, but at the time, I was incredulous. I still can’t believe that people can outright lie like that. But I know it originated with Yakub and his made devils. Then and there I realized that people will say anything and everything to try and get people to think negatively about you.

Cover your private parts. And, treat people the way YOU want to be treated, not the way you HAVE been treated.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

They’re having something called “Night on Broadway” or something downtown and I walked through on my way home last night. That store that sells the hats with my new logo was open and it’s Black-owned (low-key). (You know we can’t let devils know we own stuff or they’ll boycott us. Black people too, unfortunately. 😥 )

Anyway, the owner gave me a pink one. I feel so proud. I’ve seen Brothers and others rockin’ ’em, but not any Sisters. I’m the O.G.

I made a video on Facebook of me in it. I was going to screenshot it, but for some reason Allah is not allowing me to post any pictures to this entry.

Want me to try again?



I have a Google Chromebook and the videocamera playback quality sucks. You can’t even make out the “L.A.” I’ma try and take a snapshot of myself. BRB

Okay, I took a snapshot, but Allah Still Will not allow me to post any pictures.

The logo is so cute. It’s like the traditional L.A. logo but in cursive kinda.

I posted pictures of the hats a while ago on Facebook.

If you REALLY want to see it, it’s just like this, but smaller and pinker. 😉

I’m pretty sure they’re doing the Night on Broadway again today.

They’re doing something because the bus took a detour.

In Sha Allah, I’ll go by again. I’ve got two hours to kill before they start letting us in the shelter. So, why not?

It was fun and I got to see the cutest kid bands. They were devils, but one had a Brother Bass Player and a speckled-up girl singer. They did all original material too! I didn’t ask, but she sang them like they were original songs.

Hopefully, I’ll have as good a time as I had last night, In Sha Allah.

It beats sitting outside with a bunch of chain-smoking homeless women.


But, I’ll just be happy if I get in.

In Sha Allah.

Allahu Akbar anyway.


Al Hamdulillah.


4:35 P.M.

Captain’s Log ٣

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم




JANUARY 28, 2017 7:26 A.M.


Al Hamdulillah!



I went to the Union and they took my bed ticket AGAIN! That’s four times in less than two weeks!

So. Our teacher and leader and guide, The Honourable Elijah Muhammad (May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah Forever Be Upon Him) Taught us that if someone doesn’t want you there, find somewhere else to go.

So, since they keep taking my bed ticket, I figured they really don’t want me there.

So, I tried to get in another shelter. But, they didn’t want me there either. So, I found a place outside, but I really didn’t want to sleep outside. So, I went back to the U, and got in.

I slept in a different place.

I’ve been in the chapel so far.

I like it because it’s a chapel and it made me feel close to ALLAH.

But Allah is everywhere I am. So, I was cool in the new place.

They threw me out this morning. :/





Whenever I’m out in the cold


Somewhere Uncomfortable



It makes me feel better.

It reminds me of our poor ancestors who used to sing to make themselves feel better.





was a code worded song slaves used to use to alert other slaves on how to successfully attain their FREEDOM.

“The Drinking Gourd” was the Big Dipper.

“The River” was the Mississippi.

I think “Dead Trees” means dead bodies. 😥 😥 😥

They used to sing them like Negro Spirituals.

Most people don’t listen to lyrics in songs.

So, we could deliver secret messages and the slavemasters and overseers would not be privy to what was going on right under their racist noses.

I remember my daughter used to make up songs and sing them when she couldn’t tell me how she felt.

Music is a wonderful form of expression





Delivering Coded or Subliminal Messages

Captain’s Log ٢

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم



Captain’s Log

February 27, 2017 10:17 a.m.

Meeting with Thelma went poorly. She’s like my mother. Never liked me for some reason. But she seemed concerned about my bike. :/

I’ve learned, and she is just reinforcing my previous observations, in big organizations, everyone sticks together; even when wrong. All I can do is Love Allah. They HATE Allah and want me to hate Allah too, but Allah is BIGGER, BETTER & BADDER than they are. Even if they put me out and never let me back in, but I know that’s never going to happen, I’ll be okay.

They want me on their terms – Christianity.

But I know what’s in store for them. The Holy Qur’an says they will never stop in their attempts to turn me back to their filthy religion. So, Allah removes me from the situation before I kill somebody. At least, He Has so far…

I will fight, kill and die for Allah, which is why they perceive me as such a threat. They say they don’t turn women away. But they’ve taken my bed ticket three times. And now won’t give me another one. So, so much for that.

I’ve got a Plan B and a Plan C, but I’m not sure which is worse.

Sleeping outside or sleeping in some man’s house who is not Zawji.

I’ve never been able to sleep outside. I couldn’t do it in Leimert, so I know I can’t do it anywhere. And VIRGIL was there! It gets extremely cold (I once woke up with ice on my windshield!) and sometimes rains this time of year, but sleeping in another man’s house, even if he is not there, is emotionally agonizing and mentally terrifying because he’s coming back and he’s going to want something I can’t give. It’s confusing and highly stressful trying to deal so intimately with someone who is not worth it to me.

He’s a prize to some women but I don’t want him. I just need a place to stay and unfortunately there are predators who prey on women in my exact situation.

He says he has other women for that, but I know my value and no other woman compares to me. I’m not boasting. I just know the deal.

(“I ain’t braggin’ but I’m the ONE. Just ask me and it shall be done. Don’t bother to compare. I’ve got it!!!”)

I’m probably going to just go to another shelter. You have to sleep outside, if there’s room. It gets terribly cold at night and like I said, rains sometimes, but at least you don’t have to worry about the pigs coming and making you leave for trespassing.

Less than a week……

Wait, I HAVE slept on the street! Somewhere in Nevada, I slept in the bushes behind this bus stop. That was chill.


So, I’ll try the shelters and if I can’t get in any, then I’ll try Batman.

Captain’s Log ١

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim



Captain’s Log

Friday, January 27, 2017 3:13 a.m.


Al Hamdulillah! All Praise is due to Allah!

I am not out in the cold. I am not out in the night. I have a roof over my head. I have a cot to sleep on. I know that Superman works in the day and Batman at night. I might possibly be having a baby. :o)

In Sha Allah, tomorrow I’m telling Thelma on these two guards that always sweat me. I wish they would just leave me alone. They let me stay here tonight. But I know they’re looking for the first opportunity to kick me out. So when Thelma gets here I’m TELLING! I already wrote her a note. But I think I’m going to just tell her what happened.

They probably lied and put something in the computer so if she looks it up, it’ll have some little lie in it. But I’m just going to tell the TRUTH and hope they will leave me alone.

I think it’s because I’m a Muslim.

I mean HE could be upset because I’m in love with Zawji, SHE could be upset for the same reason if she thinks I’m her mother. That’s it. They want to be a family. :/ LOL Never gonna happen. Especially with the way they keep treating me.

“Nothing you can do, cause I’m stuck like glue to MY GUY.”

One Day EVERYONE WILL KNOW that I WILL DIE without entertaining another man.

Amad-Jamal Allah, To Whom Praises Are Due Forever is the ONLY man for me.

They don’t understand TRUE LOVE. It’s FOREVER!!!

SEPARATION doesn’t cause it to die. It makes it stronger.

TEMPTATION doesn’t make you say bye. It makes you more appreciative.

PRIVATION only tightens the tie. It makes you more dependent on each other.

Everybody thinks “There are ‘TOO MANY FISH IN THE SEA’ for me to have to deal with things I don’t like about the person I’m with.

That is definitely the wrong attitude to have if you expect to have a successful relationship. Someone tried to give me that BAD ADVICE about Zawji, but what he didn’t understand is that ALLAH Told Me Zawji is the ONLY MAN FOR ME.

In this song, the Sister was dumped. I can’t really relate because I’ve never been dumped. But cheah, if you get dumped then…

If you are thinking about leaving someone because you have problems, all you have to do is Pray and ask Allah to fix the problem. Stick with the person until the problem is worked out. Allah is the Second Coming of JESUS and HE Will Work It Out if you let HIM.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

The plan is to go to New Orleans when I get my check next. In sha Allah (If it is the Will of Allah), I’ll be able to leave that same day. I don’t want to be here any longer. I’ll have money for a hotel, so at least I won’t be in a shelter if I can’t get a same-day ticket. It’s so stressful here. They keep picking on me. Why? For HIS NAME SAKE.

The Bible warns us that the disbelievers and infidels would persecute you “for His Name’s Sake” My Name is ALLAH. It is not referring to the Christians who have the devil’s names. I have a Holy and Righteous Name of Allah.

Most Muslims go in the Name of Allah. All BLACK PEOPLE should go in the Names of Allah as HE is our Father. We should wear One Of His Names.

The Bible’s Teachings on The Devil’s Names

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

I need to look up the definition for consort. I think it means, your Best Friend who you make love to and the only one you make love to, like Zawji but with Zawji, it’s official.

In Ancient Kemet (Egypt), their Gods had “CONSORTS.” And, I was wondering why the translators used that word. BRB


[noun; kon-sawrt, verb; kuh n-sawrt]
1. a husband or wife; spouse, especially of a reigning monarch.
2. one vessel or ship accompanying another.
3. Music.

  1. a group of instrumentalists and singers who perform music,especially old music.
  2. a group of instruments of the same family, as viols, played inconcert.
4. a companion, associate, or partner
5. accord or agreement.
verb (used without object)
6. to associate; keep company:
7. to agree or harmonize.
verb (used with object)
8. to associate, join, or unite.
I think when the Ancients used it, it only referred to the female companion of a GOD. Auset was Ausar’s consort, for example. I don’t think it would be appropriate to say He was her consort. The Blackman is God. The Blackwoman is His Helpmate or consort. 😉

The difference between men and women is that men think if they give you a child, you will be bonded together forever. They think, “You don’t need a ring to be my wife.” Women think differently. They will take YOUR CHILD(REN) and go marry another man who gives them a ring.

I’m so sorry for you Brothers who have suffered the pain that comes with learning this lesson. PRAY AND THE SECOND COMING OF JESUS WILL WORK IT OUT – IF YOU LET HIM.

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

Route 66

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum Bebies!


Well, I did it.


I have left New Orleans.


I’m not in L.A. yet. But I’m close enough to feel comfortable writing.

I have an arrival time.

It’s an hour and a half later than scheduled which is really a bummer because I was going straight to Zawji’s plantation as soon as I alighted.

But there is no way I can get from dtla to Venice Beach on the bus in two hours. Then again, there is the train now…

I don’t know. I’ll have to see when I get there. Maybe I can arrive when he gets off and go from there. I might be married for real tomorrow, ya’ll. 😀

I decided not to get him fired.

A. He needs time to stack his cheddar before opening his own restaurant and

B. It’s a seafood restaurant and I’m a pescatarian who loves fine dining. And that’s all he works at. So, I’ma give him some time.

I want him to open up a restaurant somewhere on Crenshaw where they’re building that new train. I’ve seen whole business centers, including residential plazas, open up around train stations, so there’s A LOT of money to be made.

But anyway, this was the first time I’ve left New Orleans and the bus took us through downtown and I was able to make a video. Let me see if I can post it. BRB

Okay, Zawji doesn’t want me to post it until the end.

But I got on the bus and actually left. I mean, I knew I was going to do it this time. But it was almost surreal. I couldn’t believe I was actually leaving such a wonderful city like New Orleans.

But some things are bigger than just having fun. Zawji needs me more than New Orleans, so when He Calls, I Come Running.

I saw this Brother in Houston who looked like what I think Zawji looks like now and it was all I could do to keep my hands off his body. LBVS. I mean, OMG. He was about 6’3″ and had the body of a muscular ball player but not like Boris or Tyson, well maybe Tyson. I can’t really remember what he looked like, it’s been so long. LOL Maybe Tyrese but I don’t know how tall he is. But just Oh My God.

I’m still getting used to him being tall. I’m pretty sure I’m ready, but I’ve NEVER had to look up to him. We’ve always been eye to eye or close to it. Now I’ll have to stand on my tippy-toes to kiss him. That’s new.

And I feel a little insecure knowing how alluring he is to women, but he keeps telling me it doesn’t matter as long as he ONLY wants me.

It’s so funny because there’s a Subway in the New Orleans Greyhound Station (btw they get the award for dopest Greyhound Station. They have a Subway inside. And the store is off the hook. New Orleans is off the hook so of course, they offer all the New Orleans paraphernelia. Except Saints stuff. They didn’t have any Saints stuff, which made me glad I went to their pro shop and got Hakim a snapback.


I also got him an ink pen and some Ooey-Gooey Cake. He thinks I’m gonna eat it before I get home. But I’m almost there and I still have it. So, looks like he’ll get to taste it. He has good taste in foods, so I know he’ll love it like I do. I need to try and find a recipe. BRB



(I would double the cream cheese topping though. It looks pretty thin in the picture)

I got him some gold beads too. My mom used to go to New Orleans all the time and she would bring back beads but never gave any to anyone as far as I know. That just seems wrong to me. I mean how can you go to New Orleans and not give anybody any beads. She would just hang them on her rear view mirror. Maybe she gave them to other people and not me. In any case, I didn’t think about that until I was putting my son’s stuff together and I thought how selfish can you be, not to bring back beads from New Orleans for your family? It should be second nature. I mean even if they don’t care or know anything about New Orleans beads. Just give them some. They’re everywhere! But my mom is a special kinda selfish. She won’t even let me live in her garage. But that’s never stopped me. 😀 )

So anyway, I should be back in L.A. tonight, In Sha Allah, and I know it is. So, see you when I see you!

Zawji still won’t let me post the video. Maybe later…