بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
السلام علايكم و الرحمت الله و البركت
الحمد لله سبحن الله الله اكبر

As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum My Beautiful and Beloved Asiatic Black Ukhti of THE GREAT TRIBE OF SHABAZZ OF THE NATION OF ISLAM! ❤ ❤ ❤

I got the email for the website as you can see above, so if you have any questions or comments PLEASE hit me up! 🙂

I have a few questions to answer, but this one seems so important, I am going to address it, with the Help of Allah, first:

Domestic Abuse:

If the person is not your LEGAL SPOUSE, just break up with him or her.
He or she has issues that need to be resolved before growing into a deeper relationship. So get out NOW!
I would advise the person to seek professional help and then… you can call me again… ❤ ❤ ❤

MALIKAHALI.COM

She is Muslimah and has a degree from IVY LEAGUE UNIVERSITY – PENNSYLVANIA STATE.

I was erroneously calling her a PSYCHOANALYST. She quickly corrected me. She is a PSYCHOTHERAPIST.

There is a big difference between ANALYSIS and THERAPY.

Analysis is just what is sounds like. Diagnosis if you are lucky.
She not only analizes and diagnoses, but she provides a SOLUTION, in the form of PSYCHOTHERAPY.

Give her a call. 🙂

*SUPER BONUS* All of her prescriptions are HERBAL!!! YES!!!! She has designed and manufactured a special formula of herbs and plant-based remedies for every psychological ailment!

According to the HOLY QUR’AN, physical discipline by a husband toward his errant wife has distinct STEP BY STEP instructions.

1. ADMONISH
2. LEAVE THEM ALONE IN THE BED
3. ARBITRATION
   

اَلرِّجَالُ قَوّٰمُوۡنَ عَلَی النِّسَآءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللّٰہُ بَعۡضَہُمۡ عَلٰی بَعۡضٍ وَّ بِمَاۤ اَنۡفَقُوۡا مِنۡ اَمۡوَالِہِمۡ ؕ فَالصّٰلِحٰتُ قٰنِتٰتٌ حٰفِظٰتٌ لِّلۡغَیۡبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللّٰہُ ؕ وَ الّٰتِیۡ تَخَافُوۡنَ نُشُوۡزَہُنَّ فَعِظُوۡہُنَّ وَ اہۡجُرُوۡہُنَّ فِی الۡمَضَاجِعِ وَ اضۡرِبُوۡہُنَّ ۚ فَاِنۡ اَطَعۡنَکُمۡ فَلَا تَبۡغُوۡا عَلَیۡہِنَّ سَبِیۡلًا ؕ اِنَّ اللّٰہَ کَانَ عَلِیًّا کَبِیۡرًا ﴿۳۴﴾

4:34 Men are the maintainers of women, with what Allah has given – some of them above others – and with what they spend out of their wealth. So the good women are obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded. And those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them, and leave them alone in the beds and turn them away. So if they obey you, do not seek a way against them. Surely Allah is ever Exalted, Great.

وَ اِنۡ خِفۡتُمۡ شِقَاقَ بَیۡنِہِمَا فَابۡعَثُوۡا حَکَمًا مِّنۡ اَہۡلِہٖ وَ حَکَمًا مِّنۡ اَہۡلِہَا ۚ اِنۡ یُّرِیۡدَاۤ اِصۡلَاحًا یُّوَفِّقِ اللّٰہُ بَیۡنَہُمَا ؕ اِنَّ اللّٰہَ کَانَ عَلِیۡمًا خَبِیۡرًا ﴿۳۵﴾

4:35 And if you fear a breach between the two, appoint an arbiter from his people and an arbiter from her people. If they both desire agreement, Allah will effect harmony between them. Surely Allah is ever Knowing, Aware.

This is such a crucial topic – MARRIAGE!!! I think it necessary to expound so that there is no misunderstanding.

And those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them…

According to MERRIAM-WEBSTER:

ADMONISH – (verb) – admonished; admonishing; admonishes
a. to indicate duties or obligations to
b. to express warning or disapproval to; especially in a gentle yet earnest or solicitous manner
ex. The students were admonished for being late.
ex. Before riding their bikes, their parents admonished them to be careful.
ex. Public computer users are admonished to change passwords regularly.

And those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them…

I never even considered the first part. I just migrated the instruction to include any type of insubordination.

If the definition for “desertion” is taken more abstractly, it could mean mental desertion. Not actual desertion.

Per haps the wife is showing signs of distraction. She has something on her mind and is neglecting her homemaking duties.

First, admonish her by
a. to indicate duties or obligations to
“Honey, I noticed you have fallen behind in your housekeeping… There are still dishes in the dishwasher, and the baby’s pants still need a hem. What’s going on? (with a hug and a kiss) ❤ ❤ ❤ 🙂 “

Talk about it. In my experience, most times, the person doesn’t even realize that something is amiss! Gently, delineate that you have noticed a change… ❤ ❤ 🙂

b. to express warning or disapproval to; especially in a gentle yet earnest or solicitous manner.

Solicitous just means gentle yet earnest. 🙂

So again, he is supposed to appeal to his wife in a gentle, solicitous manner, ideally discovering the ROOT of the problem. What is on her mind that has her behaving thusly? Discuss it. Amend it. Move on.

🙂 ❤ ❤ ❤

If she persists, “leave them alone in their beds turning away.” In other words, show her no affection until she desists.

Finally, a form of counseling and judgement which will keep the matter as discreet as possible. Two ARBITERS. One from her side. One from his.

MERRIAM – WEBSTER

arbiter (noun)

ar·​bi·​ter ˈär-bə-tər 

 a. person with power to decide a dispute
ex. The mayor will act as the final arbiter in any dispute between board members.

b. person or agency whose judgment or opinion is considered authoritative
ex. He called in financial arbiters in the area to advise him.

As in any area of justice, each side will have an ambassador and between the four of them, a resolution is guaranteed. 🙂 ❤ ❤ ❤

REMEMBER THEM

AND THEM

AND THEM

THEM

AND ESPECIALLY US!!!!

All of your loved ones who really want you guys to honour the vows you made to yourself, Allah (God), Your family, Your FUTURE – the children who will prolong the life of your respective families, your community, OUR NATION.
We all would like to see you spend the rest of your lives in the happy anticipation that you began it with. So PLEASE…. SEEK HELP….. FOLLOW THE JUDGEMENT… AND LIVE. After a while, you will have progressed to the point wherein, In Sha Allah, you will never even remember this incident. Al Hamdulillah! Allahu Akbar. 🙂 ❤ ❤ ❤

❤ Umi ❤ 🙂

P.S.

I just realized this article is from the perspective of the man/husband/zawji.

In Sha Allah, I will write from the wife’s perspective next. 🩷🩷🩷🩷☝🏿🥰