2006

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

So, I’m living out of my Mom’s garage. I always come back here for a certain reason that I’m not ready to disclose just yet.

But I found a few of my old Journals and I’m reading the one from my conversion to Islam.

My speech is the same. I changed in the beginning and have not changed since. Al Hamdulillah.

It is interesting to recall the details of specific events that were so significant to my spiritual growth and development.

It will be ten years in March since I first converted to Islam and this Journal details everything I went through with the Farrakhaners, my feelings trying to accept their erroneous teachings. My first meeting with my Beloved Brother, Brother Darrow, who has since passed. I still miss him so much. I cried real hard remembering him. Do you ever get over the death of a loved one? I am sure he would be proud of me.

I started selling Bean Soup because of him. I had forgotten that.

Now, I’m pregnant and although I’m not married, it’s more important to continue the growth of our Nation. No one can raise a Muslim like I can. I’m like Mary. Didn’t have sex. And I’m making some more Isas  (Jesuses).

That’s more important than being married. Mary and Joseph weren’t married either. In fact about it, Joseph was married to another woman and had six children by her when he fathered Isa.

I’m a believer now that they didn’t have sex, despite what Our Beloved Messenger Teaches. Based on my own experience.

They probably got close because my Zawji did some sort of ghetto insemination. We did not have intercourse, but when I got back and couldn’t stay at the shelter, I tried to break, well I did break into my mother’s house, but I knew something was up when I couldn’t get through the window as easily as I should.

She called the police on me and they took me to the hospital, but I always come here to nest and I came right back.

Tell me why was the plant holder I had used to break the window right back in the same place, as if it hadn’t been broken when I used it to break the window?

Matrix like a mugg…..

Anyway, I used it again to break the rear window on her Cadillac. She still calls me the C word AND to me, it represents her thirst for money, which I feel was detrimental to my growing up years.

So, the police took me to the hospital again. First, the doctor told me I was slightly anemic. That only happens when I’m pregnant. Then my body temperature was low. That also happens when you’re pregnant. Then one of the nurses flat out told me, they say you’re pregnant.

Next thing I know, I’m getting nauseous in the morning and I fainted. That Only happens when I’m pregnant. Or high. 😉

Allah told me I’m having identical twin boys.

I already have their names picked out:

Ahmad ibn Amad-Jamal and

Jamal ibn Amad-Jamal.

I just looked at another Journal. It’s from 2003 and has pictures. Talk about Memory Lane. There’s a flier from my show The Underground. I’m gonna post a pic. Hold on.

20160110_165943-120160110_170007-1

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Why did I find the picture my Zawji gave me in High School? And I was JUST thinking about this picture the other day thinking it was lost forerver.

But that’s not all. It was part of my journal in High School. BUT TRIP THIS. The date is November 11, 1986.

I’ma post a picture just because he wants me to.

20160110_171715

Trying to hide those braces. 😆 Still cute. So sorry, I called you a bucket head, Habibi. I had NO IDEA who I had. Plus side is, now I do. 😊

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