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As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum Ma Beautiful and Beloved Asiatic Black Bebies!
I had such a good time yesterday chopping it up with the Big Homie.
I LOVE WHEN HE SAYS, “Behbeh!”
It tickles me.
Man, I love New Orleans.
So anyway,
I ended up shaking the spot last night before my premonition manifested itself.
If someone did find my HONEYCOMB HIDEOUT, I WASN’T THERE.
WHICH IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING.
I’m in a cafeteria charging my laptop and I swear, every devil I see, is clearly the child of the slavemaster.
That’s all I see when I see them.
The people who hate us so much that they used to buy and sell us between themselves and treat us as if we were livestock and worse because they didn’t whip their cattle.
Especially the women!
They KEPT the whip within arms reach
AND
Would not hesitate
TO
Whip A Little Black Child
FOR
NO
REASON
Other Than That
He Was The Spitting Image
OF
HER
HUSBAND
I see so much hate in their eyes when they look at me.
I’m not a slave
AND
They HATE it!
All of the other Black People here are slaves.
Because they WORK here
And I’m just sitting here drinking coffee and on my laptop
Enjoying my life
FREE
SO
The Black People kinda hate me too.
I hate to say it but they ARE still slaves
For the devils
BUT
Don’t realize it because it’s a
MENTAL SLAVERY
AND
When they see me
They Know I’m not
AND
It forces them to wake up
To the TRUTH
That they are slaves
EVEN
IF
THEY
DON’T
RECOGNIZE
THAT
THAT’S
WHAT
IT
IS
They KNOW something is not right
SO
They treat me kinda funny too.
But the devils!
The men look at me with lust and the women look at me with envy and hate.
You know the women are the ones who instigated the lynchings.
“Kill that Nigger!”
“Teach that Nigger a lesson!”
That’s what they told their men.
Every time I read about slavery, it reinforces everything I’ve ever read before of the cruelty of the slavemistress.
She was far worse than her husband.
Because she was the one abandoned when he snuck into the slave quarters and produced babies by us.
She also had to be angry because her man is so genetically inferior to mine.
Physically, aesthetically, intellectually and morally.
So she is exceptionally wicked and evil
AND
I see it when they walk by me.
The younger ones I just see, “Missy Ann” and Sister Harriet’s owner who was just a little boy.
Still devils.
The white race are devils when they come out of the womb.
They haven’t changed.
And will never change.
YOU CAN’T CHANGE THE NATURE IN WHICH YOU WERE CREATED
AND THEY WERE MADE DEVILS
EVIL AND WICKED BY NATURE.
Don’t think for a second that they love you now.
They cannot change the NATURE in which they were made
Which is to lie and kill the Black.
Some of them smile at me
BUT
You can’t fool a Muslim nowadays.
****
Yesterday, Sister Marion confirmed what I had suspected
When I was in Atlanta
AND
Crashed the City Club.
I had the premonition that all the Black people working there were related.
It was nauseating.
But, she tells everybody that she worked in the powder room at Brennans’ for 35 years.
But she told me yesterday
That several generations of her family had worked for them.
I’m convinced it dates back to slavery.
She told me she got her job through her uncle and that her grandmother and great-grandmother worked there too.
I just Googled Brennan’s but they’re not giving the complete story.
It says the restaurants opened in the seventies but Mrs. Marion said her grandmother and great-grandmother worked there too.
She also told me they had moved, so I think the information I found on Google just picks up from whatever they want to put out.
Masking their true and complete history of slave ownership.
Which is still going on in a worse way
BECAUSE
We don’t have to work for them anymore.
But when we become of age,
The only thing we are taught
Is “Go get a job.”
AND
The slavemaster seeming to be so generous
WILLINGLY OFFERS US A JOB
(Put chains back on us)
And we work for them our entire lives
AND
Encourage our children to go and work for them too
And the cycle never ends.
The whiteman has a forever slave.
He gives us gifts and makes much ado over our service
Gives us a “buttered biscuit and a pat on the head“
AND
We are content to be his forever slave.
We never think of going for self.
Working for ourselves.
OWNERSHIP NEVER EVEN OCCURS TO US.
We come here with nothing
AND
We work for the devil all our lives
AND
Leave with nothing.
Try and make something
SO
When your son gets here
He doesn’t come here with nothing
AND
He can expand on what you built
So When
His son Comes Here
He Has More Than What You
Made For His Father
AND
SO
ON
AND
We Can Finally End This Cycle Of Perpetual Slavery.
The ONLY way we can do that
IS
THROUGH
BUSINESS
OWNERSHIP
AND
THE
CREATION
AND
MASS PRODUCTION
AND
MARKETING
OF
OUR
OWN
PRODUCTS
The devil owns everything.
So, whatever he pays us
He gets it right back
When we go to him for food, clothes and shelter
AND
EVERYTHING
ELSE
WE
NEED
Just like in the days of servitude slavery.
Only now he gives us the money and we go buy it ourselves.
But we don’t OWN anything.
We don’t PRODUCE anything.
Not for ourselves.
We are nothing but laborers for the whiteman 150 years after
So, remember I gave my HONEYCOMB HIDEOUT a three on a scale of one-five as far as being secure last night?
Well, I was visited by company security this morning at 6:30.
But he was so COOL!
I cannot overstate how surprised I was.
This is the Second time I’ve been busted and was able to tell the officer about Islam!
It’s so unexpected, I can’t help but laugh. LOL
BUT
Basically, they are so-called Negroes in America just like me
BUT
More Importantly,
They are Black Gods With Infinite Intelligence
AND
ARE
Aware of the Time that we are living in
(Christianity vs. Islam)
SO
When they meet me
I get to answer all the questions they have
BUT
I don’t know what it is about Law Enforcement.
As much as I despise the position,
I have to remark how exceptionally bright they are
Compared to the everyday average Brothers I talk to.
I don’t know why.
They are making me reconsider my disdain for pigs
Cops…
I mean,
It’s REFRESHING being able to have such intelligent conversations.
I know right?
I’m just as surprised as you are
Probably
MORE so.
BUT
Anyway, I went to pickup Lulu II
AND
I am not going to deny my relief
When I saw her still parked where I left her.
Being robbed really tests your faith.
But she was there.
So, I decided to kill some time before the library opened
(at ONE)
And go to Waffle House
Instead of IHOP.
I had just had a cream cheese / caper sandwich
Before I got busted
So, I was NOT hungry
And was just going to get some coffee
BUT
I felt pressured to buy something
SO
I bought something called a Hashbrown Bowl.
The Messenger (PBUH) taught us to
“Leave those old white potatoes alone.”
And, if I had thought about that I would’ve ordered differently.
BUT
I’ve always liked hash browns
And the bread on the breakfast sandwich was too thick for my taste.
I’m pretty sure it’s not wheat bread either.
I don’t eat waffles because they are half-cooked bread
Like pancakes and are very hard on the digestive system.
So, I asked what kind of cheese they use
And when the waitress answered
“American”
I should have just rolled out then and there.
“AMERICAN CHEESE” IS NOT CHEESE
“Owing to its highly mechanized (i.e., assembly line) methods of production, and additive ingredients (e.g., oils, salts, or colors), some softer varieties of processed cheese cannot legally be labeled as actual “cheese” in many countries, even those in which slightly harder varieties can be. Such products tend to be classified as “cheese food”, “cheese spread“, or “cheese product”
Mrs. Marion came outside after we had been talking for awhile and he made himself scarce so I went to talk to her.
She was hostile towards me and
asked me who do I think I am and why do I dress like I do?
In all-white and whatnot?
For some reason she asked if I thought I was everybody’s mother.
I said “Yes, I am!“
(Ma Bebies 😀 )
She said, “You not MY mother!”
Which was kinda flattering that she would even feel like she had to say that.
Of course, I’m not her mother!
But obviously she could feel how maternal I feel towards Black People.
I told her,
“I just feel like taking care of people.”
She told me
“I’m almost 89 years old. I know you. I been dealing with people over there (in The French Quarter) All My Life. It’s just an act to get people to give you money!”
That was the first time I had heard anything like that.
I mean I had met a Brother on the bus in L.A. once who thought that we, so-called Negroes in America, just become Muslims to get that “Arab Money”
(I’m not gonna post the video because Zawji knows I like Buster, and he doesn’t like him because of it. And I’m HIS WIFE, so….)
But anyway, I didn’t really know what to say to her accusations.
The defensive is always the worst position to be in, so I just let her go on.
I mean, I told her I wear my garments because I feel comfortable in them. They are like my protection. You see I wear them every day!
She said, “Where do you live? You don’t live around here, do you?“
And I told her how hard it is for me to live with people. She knows better than anyone how everybody hates me. And she reminded me she remembered when I got into it with that old goat at the museum.
She said, “Why don’t you get a job?”
And then I felt more comfortable.
Contrary to me and her grandson,
Me and Sister Marion bumped heads when it came to male/female roles.
But I’m very versed with women who share her sentiments
AND reveled in the exchange.
Steel sharpens Steel.
And Mrs. Marion is a double-edged sword.
But then so am I.
At least she wasn’t talking favorably about devils
WHICH
Used to be our point of contention.
The three of us and their neighbor even discussed political issues
Like the murder of that football player recently.
To me, he’s just yet another Blackman murdered by devils
BUT
To most so-called Negroes, his murder carries more weight
Because he was famous.
So, I felt a little left out of the conversation because I wasn’t as informed as I guess I should have been on the details surrounding his murder, I guess.
Which is a rarity for ya gurl.
Unfortunately, these murders are becoming so common that I didn’t even think about adding him to my list until just now.
I don’t even remember his name.
SMH
BUT
Anyway, we talked until we ran out of things to say.
Sister Marion had gone back in the house,
Which I thought was hella cool.
Because that meant she didn’t mind leaving me alone
With her Grandson.
Oh yeah,
We heard the Second Line.
His well-trained ears picked up on it well before mine
But
When I asked him if he wanted to go
He said NO.
Which was completely in opposition to my well-laid plans,
But again, it’s about choices.
I could go be in a big rowdy crowd
OR
At peace, sitting on a front porch, with a handsome, decent and intelligent Blackman.
That’s a no-brainer for me.
PEACE TRUMPS EVERYTHING!!!
And there was no telling when I would have that opportunity again.
So after Sister Marion went in, and we had exhausted all topics, there were a few minutes of comfortable silence,
AND THEN
He just said he was going to go watch the Saints’ game with his uncle
And bid me a good day.
It wasn’t uncomfortable or awkward or anything
AND
I didn’t have to be the one to come up with some way to part!
The Big Easy.
That’s what I should call him.
He’s so easy to be around.
And he’s one of those Big “Scary” Blackmen
My son always says I’m attracted to
BUT
Anyway,
I just got on Lulu and rolled out.
I was tempted to go by the Second Line
BUT
I felt like that would have ruined the good time I had just had.
He is just as if not more disgusted at how Blackwomen carry themselves like whores as I am. And told me how they disgrace themselves to get his attention. For instance, he told me how one Sister in a short mini skirt bent over in front of him to pick something up, and basically showed him her shame just to get his attention.
I told him I wear long skirts, but I still don’t like to bend down much less bend OVER. I told him how I do it. I would have waited for him to catch up and said sweetly, “Brother, can you pick this up for me?” With the same end in mind – to get his attention but in a ladylike manner. Gently stroking his male ego at the same time.
There’s a big difference between classy and trashy.
PLUS, we would have spoken to each other breaking the ice.
I should give lessons. But that’s what this is.
That’s exactly how LADIES used to do it back in the day. They would “accidentally” drop a handkerchief or a glove and the GENTLEMAN would pick it up for her and thus would blossom a beautiful relationship.
It was demure and modest, but accomplished the mission without having to disgrace yourself. I am appalled at how far away from decency and morals we have gone as Blackwomen.
We are universal whores.
The product of 400 years of being used as the slavemaster’s bed wench.
We have no self-respect and will disgrace and abase ourselves for money or attention or a misguided attempt to win the affections of our male counterparts.
We are GODDESSES.
THE MOTHERS OF CIVILIZATION
THE ORIGINAL WOMAN
WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THE PARADIGM FOR ALL OTHER WOMEN OF THE UNIVERSE.
THE EXAMPLE OF PURITY AND MODESTY
FOR ALL OTHER WOMEN TO EMULATE!!!
HELD IN THE HIGHEST ESTEEM
AS THE WOMAN FROM WHOM ALL NATIONS SPRUNG
THE ORIGINATOR
BEHAVING LIKE TRASH
UP! YOU MIGHTY BLACK WOMEN!
YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH WHAT YOU WILL!!!
And that means, no matter what you’ve done in the way of indecency and immorality, you can ALWAYS reform yourself.
We both agreed that the reason the Blackwoman is in such a terrible condition is because the Blackman, who is supposed to control and PROTECT her, is more interested in pimping her. As sad and shameful as it is.
But he is also the victim of 400 years of slavery and mistreatment by the devil Caucasians and must reform himself as well. This can only successfully and permanently be done through the Divine Supreme Wisdom Teachings of The Most Honourable Elijah Muhammad (May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah Forever Be Upon Him).
You Can Read Message To The Blackman In America by clicking HERE.
He told me he saw a two-year-old, still in diapers, twerking.
I already know Allah (God) shields me from the worst of things because I’m extremely sensitive and I just can’t take it but when he told me how he hears mothers talking to their children, it brought me to tears.
Black mothers telling their little Black boys they ain’t s*#! I’m having a hard time just writing about it. How could you say that to your own flesh and blood?
Black mothers calling their little Black daughters B’s.
I don’t understand how someone could be so hateful to a Black child – ANY Black child! Not to think of YOUR OWN BLACK CHILD!!!
If I didn’t know the future, I would think we were completely and totally lost.
BUT
I
KNOW
THE
FUTURE
And that same little Black boy, whose mother said he wasn’t s*#! and wasn’t ever going to be s#*! is one day going to rule the world.
All Praise Is Due To Allah For The Honourable Elijah Muhammad (May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah Forever Be Upon Him)
Master Fard Muhammad, To Whom Praises Are Due Forever, Helped Keep Me On The Straight Path because toward the end of our conversation, I told him that one day, there were going to be Messengers asking, “Whose side are you on, America’s or the Muslims?”
He had a little difficulty with that and said something like you would hear in church and then that the question would be, “Whose side are you on God or the devils’?”
I said, “That’s the same thing. American devils or God and the Muslims?”
That idea took a little getting used to, but he’s on our side.
So, I left and went to the store and got caught up in some Saints’ traffic.
They lost, of course.
I hate to say it because it’s so sad. Everybody here LOVES the Saints but I can’t remember them ever winning. Maybe they win when I’m not following the game but if love and support could win a game, they would never lose because they love them some SAINTS in New Orleans.
But I made it through the traffic just as it started to rain.
I went to the library and charged my phone.
Started writing this and when I left it was pouring.
So, I left Lulu there and went to the HONEYCOMB HIDEOUT.
As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum Ma Beautiful and Beloved Black Bebies!
I knew when I published my last blog that I was going to wake in the middle of the night and write some more.
But I didn’t say anything because sometimes I like to keep things to myself.
Anyway, I watched “Emperor Jones” starring Paul Robeson and was really surprised to see the level of romantic drama there was back in those days.
For some reason, I thought people were less scandalous then.
It was interesting to see Brother Paul in his signature film and I was not expecting to feel the emotion toward his character that the film manifested in me.
It was a good movie.
And judging by how many times they said, “Who dat?” and the Yoruba references, I would not be surprised if the writer was from New Orleans.
That was a complete surprise.
Brother Paul was a significant character in Black History in the United States, as far as entertainment. But he was political too.
I don’t watch movies (dramas) as a general practice, but this was more like a history lesson than anything else.
So, I woke up a little while ago and realized, you don’t have to be in jail to have those lonely late night thoughts.
For some reason, I feel like it’s time to write about Costello.
I feel like I have to start from when I messed up with Zawji in High School.
I cheated on him and started dating this other guy who went to my school.
I wasn’t capable of loving from a distance.
I’m getting a crash course in it now.
So anyway, I ended up marrying the other guy but he cheated on me and we divorced after two years.
We had a daughter though, who has Zawji’s initials. That was completely by chance. I didn’t even realize it until a few years ago.
I saw him at the beach one day when she was still in the stroller
AND
HE
BENT
DOWN
AND
KISSED
HER
FULL
ON
THE
MOUTH
Then got up and walked away without even looking at me.
He’s so wise.
I wasn’t ready
BUT
He still loved me
AND
He showed me by showing his love for my daughter.
I think he knew/realized
We were going to get back together one day
Because
She has his initials.
I think he knew back then,
Even when I didn’t.
But was just biding his time.
Allahu Akbar
❤ ❤ ❤
Anyway, I was with Costello at the time.
So, I really didn’t deserve any more than what he gave me
Which was nothing
But tough love
❤ ❤ ❤
After I found out my husband cheated on me,
We had a physical altercation
AND
I put him in jail for abuse
BUT
Later went and dropped the charges.
I think even then I had a disdain for pigs.
We tried to work it out
BUT
The Trust Was Gone
AND
I started seeing other men.
He was in the Navy
SO
He was away from home a lot.
I think he gave up
WHEN
I was dating this Brother from Compton
He called it “Camptown“
I didn’t know why then,
BUT
I think it’s because of all the horses
AND
Big Backyards
ANYWAY
He carried a gun
AND
I
REALLY
LIKED
HIM
He Was Fine!!!
I met him on Crenshaw
AND
I know I must have really liked him because I still remember his name.
Anyway,
They ran into each other outside our apartment
AND
The Brother from Compton shot at my X.
He had already told me what he would do if that situation occurred
(shoot in the leg so as not to kill him)
So, I knew not to worry.
He didn’t get shot though.
❤ ❤ ❤
Anyway, I was working at a typist job I got through the Navy
And it was for a company that photocopied medical records for lawyers.
I used to type up the legal documents necessary to procure the records.
So, they hired this new Brother to go out and photocopy the records
AND
He was cute
SO
I told all the other Sisters who worked there that
He was mine.
Well, one day, he came to the clerical section to run off some copies at the photocopy machine and when I saw him, I made everybody in my department find something for me to go copy.
So, I sashayed over to the photocopier and worked my mojo on him.
We hooked up and I knew he was cheating on me very early in the relationship.
He was ALWAYS talking about his X and comparing me to her.
He used to make me feel so inadequate. I didn’t know the word back then but now I can never forget.
He used to say, “There’s just five pounds between fat and fine.”
And here I am 125 pounds.
The perfect weight and he’s making me feel inadequate.
He used to sell weed, so he’d be gone “on a run” often
And most of his clientele were women.
Well, one day I figured out he had lied to me about his whereabouts and a Sister we worked with confirmed my suspicions.
BUT
I didn’t break up with him.
I guess I thought I was “in love”
BUT
That’s no excuse for stupidity.
I was 22 and had been reared in Christian America
Where they don’t teach values and morals and self-respect.
WELL,
Yes, they do
BECAUSE
Growing up my goal was to stay a virgin until I got married
THEN
I
FOUND
OUT
ALL
MY
FRIENDS
FROM
CHURCH
HAD ALREADY DONE IT
!!!!
So America preaches values, but it is hard to actually find them
In America.
❤ ❤ ❤
Anyway,
He was a good provider and when I got fired from my job
OVER
(him and another woman who worked there )
Me and my daughter moved in with him.
My X never gave me a dime in child support.
Even though it was court ordered.
So, we were playing house
Living it up in the LBC.
We were both in college
And I used to go watch him play football
AND
He was such a showman!
Every time they played,
Somehow his shirt managed to get ripped off
LOL
He had a roommate
AND
It was like Party Central at our house
There were ALWAYS people there
We had a rule
You couldn’t hit the bong until you brushed your teeth LOL
There was always a game of dominoes going on
Or a freestyle session.
I remember one time Lil’ 1/2 Dead was over
AND
ALL
The guys were dickriding
Me and the girls were just so annoyed
It was so bad that my three-year-old daughter said,
“He’s getting on my nerves.”
I was like, “Who?“
And she pointed to Lil 1/2 Dead
LOL
He used to cook too.
He’s the reason I stopped eating pork
Way before I became a Muslim
But he’s also the reason I started smoking weed.
He used to leave his stash at my house
Before we moved in together
AND
One night me and my cousin were bored
SO
We decided to smoke some.
Why did we call the radio station
Because they were taking calls for people who wanted to tell a joke
AND
I
GOT
ON
THE
RADIO
High as Hell
And tried to tell a joke.
The DJ was like,
“Oh, okay, thank-you.“
And I wasn’t even through.
SMH
So, anyway, he introduced me to Reggae
And we used to go to Dancehall clubs
And “wind.”
He could really dance.
Not as good as my Zawji though.
We’d go to holidays with my family
AND
Even hooked up our friends.
Two of them are still married to this day
And have three children.
BUT
He used to tell me that
He could get with my cousins
If he wanted too.
I didn’t really pay too much attention
To that kind of talk.
I just let it go in one ear
AND
Out the other.
But years later,
AFTER
He went to jail,
He wrote a book,
AND
One of my cousins (the married one) was asking about it
I thought that was strange
BUT
Didn’t put two and two together
Until a few years ago.
She had said she wanted to read it.
She was the ONLY one out of all our friends
Who showed so much interest in wanting to read his book.
I mean, we all wanted to read it
BUT
She wanted to read it too badly.
So, I know something was up.
That has taken me a long time to admit.
It hurts.
And I love her husband like a Brother.
He’s in the Nation
(albeit with Farrakhan)
But out of all my family members
He’s one of the few I still talk to
I don’t even talk to my cousin
(his wife)
We’re just a few months apart,
I’m the elder
And always looked out for her
We went to the same schools
for Jr. High AND High School
AND
When we got older
AND
Her Mom
(My father’s sister)
Kicked her out
I let her come and live with me.
I didn’t think anything of it.
I subconsciously, look at her like she’s more of a Sister
Than a cousin
I always mistakenly call her children my niece and nephews
That’s how I know
She’s always been “The Golden Child”
In our family
AND
I was “The Black Sheep”
BUT
To think that she went behind my back
To try and get with my boyfriend
IS
Something that most people would probably
Expect to be the other way around
BUT
I would NEVER do anything like that
So
It is difficult for me to accept
BUT
As difficult as it is to accept
I know it’s true.
I am going to give her the benefit of the doubt
And assume it was before she hooked up with her husband.
BUT
I don’t know
Because Costello used to tell me about how he (her husband) had sex
AND
I don’t know
Any other way
He Could Have Known
UNLESS
She Told Him…
At the time,
I thought maybe one of her husband’s exes
Had told him,
Because they had been friends for a long time.
Now I’m not so sure.
I just saw him when I went to Atlanta
BY CHANCE
Because I didn’t look them up
AND
He is doing a good job taking care of her.
I’m sure nothing ever became of it
Otherwise, he would’t have told me
BUT
Just to know she went after him…
So scandalous.
Skanless.
It’s always the quiet ones…
She IS one of the main reasons I joined The Nation though.
When I saw her in her M.G.T. uniform
I couldn’t WAIT to get in one.
The difference is
She couldn’t wait to get out of it.
She only wore it to the Mosque.
I wear mine every day!
****
BUT
Anyway,
Things came to a head
WHEN
One of his side chicks got pregnant.
I stayed with him though.
But when he brought the baby home
I couldn’t take it and threw a brick through one of his windows.
I guess I had moved out by then.
Anyway, unbeknownst to me,
The baby was right there by the window
SO
Then he starts going on about how I was trying to kill his baby.
BUT
He said it like he was impressed with me
SO
He ends up moving back to Indiana
But
We’re still keeping in touch.
He ends up going to jail for fifteen years
For something I’m not even sure of to this day.
But I’m sure it wasn’t drugs.
I even flew out to Kentucky to visit him.
And caused so much drama that his fellow inmate whose girlfriend hosted me told her that she couldn’t talk to me after I left.
❤ ❤ ❤
He had a Best Friend in jail, named Killer.
Killer was from Watts.
But I didn’t know Killer was so FINE!!!
I
DIDN’T
KNOW
IT
THEN
BUT
He Was Zawji’s Doppelganger…
So, we’re in the visiting room talking and Killer and his guests are behind my back.
So, I get up and go to the bathroom
BUT
When I come back
I sit on the other side
SO
I could see
Killer.
This little move did not go unnoticed by Costello.
He commented on it.
BUT
Anyway,
Shortly after our visit, Costello got transferred to another prison
But inmates are not allowed to send each other mail.
So, I was the designated liaison between Costello and Killer.
Funny thing happened…
Me and Killer started writing each other.
And, I guess he told everybody because Costello started crying about how it made him look and the Sister told me her husband told her she couldn’t talk to me anymore.
I didn’t care.
Shoot.
He had had a BABY with somebody else!!!
But the thing with Killer was shortlived and I still kept in touch with Costello.
If I had had ANY sense I would have stayed with Killer.
He was so intelligent and had NEVER worked for the DEVIL.
I really admired that.
He also told me something that I still use today when people call me crazy.
He told me
“Where I come from, CRAZY is a GOOD thing!”
Watts up!
❤ ❤ ❤
So, next thing I know,
(This was in 1999 and we met in 1992)
He’s telling me they’re transferring him to another prison
AND
This time he’s going Greyhound
AND
He’s coming through L.A.
Can I rent a car,
Come pick him up,
AND
Drive him from Palm Springs to L.A.,
SO
We could spend some time together.
But Of Course, I can do that for you, Baby.
SO,
We get to spend the designated time together,
Then I drop him off at the Greyhound station in L.A.
But he tells me not to go in,
“Stay right here.”
That struck me as kinda weird
SO
I
FOLLOWED
HIM
AND
Sure enough, there he is
Talking to some girl who’s on the same bus.
I felt like a fool.
But I was acting like one
AND
Couldn’t blame anyone but myself.
I mean,
I KNEW who I was dealing with.
Why should I think he had changed?
But I was “in love.”
So, early in the relationship I had gotten pregnant
But he took me to get an abortion.
And unbeknownst to me
This time when I picked him up
I got pregnant again.
But I was taking medication and didn’t have a period
SO
I didn’t know
Until it was too late.
I had to hike up this steep dirt hill
To get home
And ended up losing the baby.
It was a boy.
BUT
Allah Knows Best
Because Now I Don’t Have Anything To Attach Me To Him
So, he’s at Lompoc in Northern California
AND
Hooks me up with one of his fellow inmate’s woman
AND
We go out there to visit them.
I had started going to the Mosque by this time
AND
The Sister was late picking me up
SO
I had changed clothes
AND
Was preparing to go to M.G.T. class
When she showed up.
So, instead of sexy and fly, in those pictures
I was modest and appealing.
Allah Knows Best.
That was my last visit.
I started trying to practice Islam but I was with Farrakhan
AND
HE Knew Farrakhan is not right
SO
He wasn’t trying to hear it.
BUT
AFTER
I
LEFT
FARRAKHAN
I
WAS
LIKE
I can’t talk to you anymore
Unless you become a Muslim.
That’s the ONLY way I’ll know
You’ve Changed.
SO
I finally stopped talking to him
Islam gave me the courage and intelligence to finally leave a toxic relationship
It was 2006 now
Fifteen years!
So, whenever I used to get mad at him, he would go to my mother to try and get her to get me to let him have another chance. So, even though I wasn’t talking to him, apparently they still kept in touch because the next thing I knew. Whoever was President at that time had issued some type of order cutting sentences for federal inmates and my mother told me there was a good possibility that he could be getting out sooner than later.
So, it’s 2008 and I just have a feeling that I’m going to run into him in Leimert Park. This was before I started talking to Allah. But I knew.
Sure enough, one Monday, outside of drum workshop, I see him walking up. We talk for a minute and then Osiris appears (now before I saw Costello, Osiris had told me he would pay for Hakim’s drum lesson he just had to go get some change) So here he comes and I tell Costello, “Watch this” and Osiris hands Hakim a five dollar bill.
I felt like The Mack.
LOL
So, we’re wrapping up our conversation and this woman pulls up and he starts showing her attention and making me feel ignored and inadequate like he always did. But I still talk to him on the phone later.
I told him about Da Poetry Lounge and he talked to my daughter, on the phone. He always made me feel like when she was old enough, he would have an affair with her. Because he was always talking about how he cared about her more than me. But it was different than when Zawji did it. Because they have different backgrounds with me. I never ever saw Zawji with another woman until 1999. But that’s too painful to write about.
But anyway, he went to Da Poetry Lounge, told me it was lit, and I’ve never heard from him again.
I didn’t want to tell him about it.
But I guess Allah Made Me To Finally Get Him Out Of My Life.
He Had To Replace Me With Something, I guess.
Artists can make love to their art.
(He sings and writes)
So, human companionship is not as…
Louis Armstrong said his wife knew she came second to his music.
And Duke Ellington titled his book, “Music is my Mistress”
I still feel a sense of loss after all these years.
And can only thank Allah for protecting me and giving me my Zawji.
White musicians select bandmembers based on color.
Black musicians select bandmembers based on sound.
That’s why you see allwhite bands.
But never allBlack bands.
It’s bigger than music.
“You would rather have a lexus or justice? A dream or some substance?
A beamer, a necklace or FREEDOM?!?!”
****
I was singing yesterday.
Trying not to be too loud and disturb the other guests.
Next thing I know,
I hear people gathering on the balcony
Right outside my window.
AND
I SHUT UP
BECAUSE
I
KNOW
THEY
WERE
DEVILS
AND
I DON’T SING FOR DEVILS
!!!
****
I’m watching part two of this documentary on Black women entertainers
AND
It just dawned on me
THAT
I
MADE
IT
PAST
44
That was my goal because my favorite singer, Phyllis Hyman, committed suicide at 44 and Billie Holiday died at 44.
SO
I figured if I could made it past 44,
I’d be okay.
I’m 45 now.
****
I keep hearing these exceptionally loud aircrafts overhead
AND
I knew they couldn’t be planes
AND
I’m outside at the Library
AND
They just flew overhead
Let me see if I can find a picture of what I just saw
There were two of these
It sounded like more came after them and I tried to get a video but they didn’t fly over my line of sight.
Why are they flying over New Orleans?
This what I think
****
SO
I’M
REALLY
Starting to get bored with life.
Like, I’m wondering what I’m going to do tomorrow?
It’s supposed to rain
SO
I guess my goal is to try and stay dry
That’s a challenge in itself being homeless
Like I am.
The library is only open from 1-5
Then they’re gonna be closed until the 18th!
But I’m like our Dear Sister Harriet
She never worried
AND
Neither do I.
I’m just a tad bored.
****
There’s a parade today and I met a Brother selling ooey gooey cake, and you know I had to support. I love ooey gooey cake. Tell me why did this Sister in a uniform come giving him all kind of flack talking about his vending license was only for Second-Lines? She wouldn’t let me buy it!!!
The poison runs deep in these Southern Black People.
She said she was just trying to feed her family like he was.
I said, “Yeah, but he’s working for himself. You’re working for the government, who doesn’t even care about you!”
So anyway, he turned in the direction I was going and once we got away from “Sargent Carter”, we made the transaction. Christians….
I can’t believe how hateful and vindictive we are to our own people to the satisfaction of our enemies. She was working for the government and her JOB is to hinder a Blackman from doing something for self so he will always be dependent upon the devil slavemaster.
If she would take a free step instead of working for the devil and propagating the enemies plan to keep us dependent on him, we might be able to get ahead as a NATION.
Even more than not having a place to use the bathroom.
Not having a place to cook.
Or to keep your stuff.
All that stuff can be worked around and pales in comparison to the inability to take a full ablution.
New Orleans doesn’t have the resources other cities I’ve visited have.
I mean they have drop in centers where you can go just to get off the street without worrying about trespassing and most of these places offer services like showers and laundry and stations where you can charge your phone.
All New Orleans has, well I’ve heard of the VA, and there’s this place that offers services but there’s this huge mural of Mary, mother of Isa (Jesus) on the wall and that’s like my kryptonite. I’d rather break into somebody’s house and take a shower than go in there.
Then there’s the VA which is where it’s looking like I’m gonna end up since the hypocrites at the masjid are living up to their name and not letting me in. Even though I did get in to get my stuff, so maybe…
I’ve got one other spot, but them employees trip HARD so I think I’ma try the VA first.
See what it’s like, at least…
‘member the last time I did that…???
It ended horribly.
BUT
Her band is on point! This is why I love live music. Also dope how they’re all dressed alike She should have done the same thing with her backup singers
****
Why do I have some crazy devil leaving me all these filthy comments?
I haven’t said anything but it’s been about six months.
I finally marked his comments as spam and they all disappeared.
Allahu Akbar!!!
****
SO
Gmail asked me if I wanted business e-mail and Razzaq was like “Yeah”
SO
I
HAD
TO
DO
ALL
THIS
TECH-Y
STUFF
But I think I set up my new e-mail
LOVEALLAH@HOMEMAKINGFORTHEBLACKWOMAN.COM
!!!
IS THAT THE FRESHEST THING YOU’VE SEEN EVER OR WHAT???
****
I haven’t forgotten about
Homemaking For The Blackwoman .com LIVE!!! either
It just doesn’t look like I’m going to be traveling anywhere anytime soon.
ROOTS, remember?
But maybe I can have something here in New Orleans.
And, you guys can just come here.
I mean, I love it here.
AND
You can come and see why.
Maybe
That’s what Allah and Razzaq want me to start doing
To keep me from being bored.
I’ll be like Sister Harriet
And ask for contributions.
I already know where I want to have it.
I guess I could start a gofundme campaign
BUT
I’d rather have corporate sponsors
You know how strongly I feel about Black Businesses.
I am organizing a series of events that are designed to instruct the Blackwomen in the United States of America into The Knowledge of Self, which includes a Return to Her Proper Natural Role As Homemaker and Housewife.
Naturally, the foundation will be upon Islam, as that is the only solution to our problem here in the Wilderness of America, but equally as important are acquiring such basic homemaking skills as sewing, cooking and cleaning, rearing children and taking care of our husbands, which are unfortunately, not taught among the members of the Black community as they once were, if ever, and are becoming lost arts.
Home Economics has also been removed from the United States school system and our young Sisters are graduating from High School having never been exposed to even the rudiments of the things that are required of them as Blackwomen.
HOMEMAKINGFORTHEBLACKWOMAN.COM LIVE!!!!! will Include a Welcoming Night featuring a film screening of THE NATION OF ISLAM’S 1974 SAVIOUR’S DAY CONVENTION LECTURE; an “HOW TO EAT TO LIVE” COOKING CLASS; a SEWING DEMONSTRATION; as well as a symposium on HOW TO TREAT OUR HUSBANDS.
Each session will be offered free of charge, as This is the Day in Which the TRUTH MUST BE MADE MANIFEST and the Truth is FREE to any and all who seek it. Therefore, in order to offset production costs, I am offering BLACK BUSINESS OWNERS the opportunity of sponsorship and promotional advertising.
Donations are also welcome in the form of such items as
SEWING MACHINES & SEWING KITS
CROCK POTS
PRESSURE CANNERS & MASON JARS
CORNINGWARE
DUTCH OVENS (ANY SIZE)
KITCHEN UTENSILS (COOKING & CUTLERY, LOAF & PIE PANS & ROLLING PINS)
SMALL KITCHEN APPLIANCES SUCH AS MIXERS & BLENDERS
MONETARY FUNDS
All contributors will have the opportunity to advertise on promotional giveaways such as lanyards, gift bags, recipe booklets, souvenir brochures, ink pens & notepads, keychains &c.
Furthermore, Each Business Will Be Prominently Advertised On All Promotional Paraphernalia (fliers, radio spots, social media, Internet sites, billboards & Television Public Service Announcements)
THANK-YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR KIND GENEROSITY AT WHATEVER LEVEL OF SPONSORSHIP YOU CHOOSE.
IN THE MOST HOLY AND RIGHTEOUS NAME OF ALLAH,
MASTER FARD MUHAMMAD,
TO WHOM PRAISES ARE DUE FOREVER,
السلام عليكم AS-SALAAM-ALAIKUM
Your Sister,
~ SISTER LOVE ALLAH ❤ ❤ ❤
****
So cheah,
I think I really need to go hear some live Jazz tonight.
I might stop at the Playhouse first
BUT
If it’s devils
I’ma go see Brother Jason
Only thing is
YUP
Worst fear confirmed
I just YT’d Jason and he has more devils in his band than Papa, Wynton and Branford combined.
It’s starting to drizzle anyway.
BUT
That might be the best time to go out
Less people.
But I’m so bored!
I guess I’ll have to set up a paypal or something so I can accept contributions.
****
I guess I’m not going anywhere
I found a spot
AND
It’s Level 3 secure
Out of 5
So, we’ll see
إن شاء الله
I can stay here until the Library opens up at one mañana.
I wanted to go get some salmon at Cleo’s but the last time I went the owner was so rude to me! For no reason. I thought the owners would be cool because they have an Arabic poster on the wall. But he was trippin’ for real for real. To the point where I’m like Forget ya’ll. But it’s SO HARD to find healthy food in New Orleans. I hate being at the mercy of people who don’t like me.
BUT
I’m a so-called American Negro
AND
That’s all we’ve known for the past 400 years…
I have some kipper snacks and bread I can eat instead.
I’m just trying to make sure I get enough protein since I can’t make my Bean Soup.
I would eat a couple boiled eggs every day if the only place I knew that sold them wasn’t so far away.
I can’t believe I’m saying this but
I miss Skid Row.
I could take a shower
AND
Get boiled eggs.
It just smells worse than a dumpster.
And there’s the most sickening water on the ground in some places.
****
I just ate that “ooey gooey cake.”
I thought I was getting chocolate but it was just a brownie.
I wish he would have told me.
I probably would have bought the cake instead.
“Probably” LOL
THAT’S why he didn’t tell me. SMH ;/
****
Anyway, I still can’t remember what I was going to write about yesterday.
I’m not going to say it must not have been that important because
When I did remember – before I was able to write –
I felt like it was important.
Oh well.
I’m just gonna publish this and turn in early.
I had such a good time with Zawji last night.
We role-played LOL
I was the homeless little girl
And he was the officer who caught me trespassing.
LOL
He handcuffed me.
OMG
LOL
I have such a vivid imagination
BUT
That’s what separates me from the norm.
AND
Makes me so interesting.
I’ve accepted it
The good and the bad.
Master Fard Muhammad, To Whom Be Praised Forever, upon His Coming To Us
As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum Dearly Beloved Asiatic Black Bebies
Meet Lulu II
O/G Lulu was refurbished, probably over thirty years old and cost $140.00
Lulu II is brand new and cost $79.00
And is much easier and MORE FUN TO RIDE!!!
I feel like going back to the place I bought O/G Lulu and putting my foot up somebody’s you-know-what.
I thought I was going to be paying three or four hundred for a new bike, since she was refurbished and cost $140,
Then I get to Walmart and the first pink bike I saw was a Panama Jack and it had a basket and a cup holder and I trepidatiously (LOL You know I make up words 😉 ) looked at the price tag and when I saw $129, I was floored!
So, I kept looking around and saw Lulu II, and she didn’t have a basket or anything but she was pink. Razzaq told me to get her. I wanted the Panama Jack, but I’ve learned to hear and obey. So, I found the baskets and they had this fabric bag that you could remove but it was too complicated to affix AND it was lavender so it wouldn’t match. I thought $20 was a lot too.
So, I looked at the traditional wicker baskets like O/G Lulu had but you couldn’t remove it AND it cost $25!!!
So, I saw some smaller baskets and one of them was pink so I attached it to Lulu II and it looked like it came with her. So……. $Free.99 😉
****
I was also able to get a camisole I really needed that I don’t know where else to get one but Wal. I searched for about twenty minutes trying to find my size! All they had were 2X and XXL and I’m a Swedish LOL I was SO happy when I found that Mug! I almost kissed the lady working there! LOL
****
So, anyway, I was going to buy a lock at Walmart but it’s a good thing I tried them out before I bought them because I tried two different ones and they both got stuck when I was trying to set the lock!
So, I decided to just go back to the bike store where I bought O/G Lulu and get the same lock I had for her.
I’m still puzzled how they got her.
That was the BEST lock they had.
So, I’m not going to spend so much money this time, In sha Allah.
The only reason why I got that one was because you didn’t need a key.
I don’t have any other keys, so I didn’t trust myself trying to keep up with a little bike lock key. Same thing is in e-f-f–e-c-t, but I’ma see if I can find a cheaper one. That one was $35.00!
****
I also like Lulu II’s handlebars better than O/G’s. They’re like high and I can lean back!
(You dealin’ with some real O/Gs….)
****
They had fishing poles at Wal and I saw a pretty hot pink one and it was only $12.97!
But it looked so complicated! I thought all you have to do is just put the bait on the hook and you’re ready to go. But this one required a little assembly. So, I guess I’ll be YTing fishing tutorials…
So, I left Wal about 9:30 but the other bike store doesn’t open up until 12 or 12:30, so I came to “the office” to kill some time.
I knew they wouldn’t trip about me bringing in Lulu II
And I sent an e-mail to Kool DJ Herc
Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim
In the Name of Allah, The Beneficent, The Most Merciful
As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum Dearly Beloved Brother, DJ Kool Herc,
May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah be upon you!
I am a B-Girl and a writer who is interested in helping you pen your autobiography.
I grew up with Hip-Hop and have done extensive research on the origin of hip-hop and seen and read numerous of your interviews but there is nothing like hearing the story directly from the person whose story it is. And Hip-Hop is definitely your story, Dear Brother
The Hip-Hop community NEEDS to hear YOUR story from YOU!!! I am a writer and would be willing to help you write your autobiography. I say autobiography as opposed to memoirs because I am an avid reader of both and prefer autobiographies. They tell a better story.
In short, my Dear Beloved Brother, PLEASE write your autobiography! Admittedly, I have never written a book (although I do have a blog www.HomemakingForTheBlackwoman.com) so, I have not the first idea about publishing but maybe you would consider an e-book, wherein somehow you could include videos, music and links.
I mean, this IS the digital age, and Hip-Hop started off with the music and ended up revolutionizing the entire music industry. Might as well continue the tradition and push the envelope by revolutionizing the publishing industry to include videos and digital music instead of just photos. Let’s make use of ALL of the technological resources at hand!!!
Thank-you in advance, Dear Brother, I look forward to hearing from you soon.
btw Thank-you for explaining the term “Put your ‘stink’ on it.”
May Allah Bless You, Dearly Beloved Brother, With MONEY, A Good Home, Friendship in all walks of life and Peace of Mind and Contentment!
In the Name of Allah,
As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum
Your Sister,
~ LOVE ALLAH️
But I used lavender ink and this whimsical font.
****
I wanted to write about something else but I cannot remember what it was….
I still have a little time before the bike store opens so, I’ma chill for a minute and see if I can remember.
Okay, I remembered one thing – the handlebars.
But it was something else too.
Anyway, I’m in my hotel room now, having successfully completed every mission I had planned.
I even fooled this Sister into thinking I was from New Orleans. LOL
She asked me “Why do you look like I know you?”
I said, “Probably from around here.”
She asked me where I was from.
I said, “Around here” (Treme’)
Then she asked me what High School I went to.
I said, “Clark” LOL
I knew that school has been here a long time because the Brother I met last time I was there told me he went there and he was in his seventies!
She asked me if I knew some people named “Carter?”
And I was like
“Hmm, Carter? That name sounds sofamiliar!” LOL
So, we started talking and whatnot
But she told me she went to this restaurant around the corner and bought some fish.
And you know I was like, “I hope not catfish, that’s the only fish ya’ll eat out here!”
And then I was like
“Oops!“
But she didn’t catch it.
So, I figured I had better ‘fess up before she caught me.
But that was fun.
****
I’m kinda pissed because a Second-Line just went down the block, but I wasn’t dressed so I missed it. 😦 I was thinking about going to see Papa Marsalis. He’s going to be at this venue I’ve heard is really nice, but I don’t feel like going anywhere. It’s so rare that I have a place like this. I want to take full advantage.
His “other” son, Jason, is going to be there tomorrow and I kinda like him. He stayed in New Orleans like Papa, while his two Brothers (Wynton and Branford) left. Oh wait, that’s the “other other” Brother – Delfeayo. LOL
Anyway, I’ve been wanting to go to this venue so I might as well go while I have some money. I’m not going to be able to get a hotel as often as I thought anyway, because I had to buy another Lulu.
****
Looks like I’m gonna be up in the VA with the homeless people *sigh*
Make dua for me, People
(Pray for me)
(But don’t pray to no mystery god up in the sky that doesn’t exist)
(Pray to the ONE True and Living God, Allah, Master Fard Muhammad,
To Whom Praises Are Due Forever)
****
I feel like I’m on a business trip. Lying in the hotel room typing on my laptop.
It feels good.
Kinda like what I expect if I go to NYC to interview Kool DJ Herc.
Aw man, not NYC again… 😀
****
Why is another Second Line going down the block?
Then again, it might be the same one because it sounds like it’s coming from the other direction.
I wanna go out there SO BADLY, but then I don’t….
****
THE MUSIC THO!
The only thing keeping me from going out there, is I know by the time I get dressed they’re gonna be gone and I’ve seen people running after Second Lines before and it is not a good look, but they sound like they stopped right outside!!!!
Oh Lort.
The music stopped.
I’m getting dressed
BRB
Nah, I sat up and the heat in the room just enveloped me like a warm hug.
Both Miles Davis and Duke Ellington wrote of bandmembers from New Orleans who got homesick and abandoned them.
I don’t recall reading or hearing about any musicians from anywhere else who did that.
****
But anyway, I still can’t remember what else I wanted to write about.
Can you believe I had never seen that video? (Friday)
I mean I’ve seen the movie numerous times but I’ve never seen the music video.
Kinda funny to see Oshea getting his groove on.
Reminded me so much of my baby, Lil A.J.. When she was around four she used to throw her hands up and dance just like a gangsta. LOL
They always gotta put some hoes in the video though.
That’s the only part I didn’t like.
That’s like all I ever see Black women doing in the media.
Half-naked and twerkin’.
I mean, I’ve seen shows with Blackwomen working at the hospital or as cops. I mean, that show with G-Money had a Blackwoman and she was a housewife, but why we always gotta be fat? Can’t we be housewives and sexy? Get one of them hoes and put an apron and pearls on her and place her in the kitchen baking cookies for her well-adjusted children. Introduce her to your stove, Cube! lbvs
(Everything except the pole, doing drugs and f*in yo hoe. :/) (Just the part about baking pies 😀 )
But anyway, today is payday and I can finally clean up.
I mean, I haven’t showered since last Thursday, but I don’t stink.
I have the Love Allah scent.
You know how in some Muslim countries they don’t wear deodorant because it covers up your natural scent. Well, that’s what I’m rocking. My natural scent and it smells good.
Some people smell like booty or must.
But I’m a Muslimah and I just smell feminine.
Oh God.
Let me stop.
My pheromones already attract Brothers like moths to a flame.
I don’t want my cyberspace Brothers
Trying to hmu too. 😀
But yeah, it’s not the scent that bothers me.
It’s this layer of dust that has settled over my clothes.
I wish I could hand wash them to make SURE they get really clean.
The machine doesn’t get them as clean as I can
When I hand wash.
But these janky laundromats don’t even have sinks!
And I got banned from the two I know of that do.
SO
I might just have to wash them twice.
No, I know!
I’ll go to the janky laundromat that still has the top-loading machines
And I’ll just open it up and hand wash from the machine.
I’ve seen the Mexicans do that in L.A.
I just gotta get some quarters somewhere
****
So, I’m reading the other Harriet biography and it’s basically the same
As the first one,
Just a little meatier.
All the same stories, except for one new one so far.
I haven’t heard one human voice since I’ve been here.
It’s almost like being in a cave up on a mountain.
I’m even surrounded by cement.
When I first got here,
I kept thinking
“What if we have an earthquake and all this cement falls down on me?!?!!!!“
Then I remembered
I’m in New Orleans 😀
LOL
So, then I felt really safe…
****
The first thing I did after I felt I was safe
WAS
Dig in to that $2.00 APPLE.
Oh My God!
Why could I smell it as soon as I took it out my bag?!?!?!
So good……
(“Candy kisses everywhere…” LOL) (Sorry about the interracial thing they got going on. Just ignore it.) (“Race-mixing is SHAMEFUL!” – Elijah Muhammad [Peace Be Upon Him])
SO
I think the FIRST thing I’m gonna do is
WASH MY CLOTHES
But I’m not gonna be able to shower until
I can check into a hotel.
I might have to start going to the VA to shower.
BUT
I HATE BEING AROUND HOMELESS WHITE PEOPLE
Talk about WHITE TRASH!!!
I HATE THEM.
They group up together and it just makes me feel worse about Black People and our lack of unity. We’d rather befriend them than each other. I’ve seen a Black woman go up to a devil woman and put her arm around her and hug up on her, then when the devil got around the other devils, they just ignored the Sister and she was standing right there. They made a little circle and she was outside of it looking stupid. All I could do was shake my head because she was one of the “krewe du blondes” and hated me because I don’t like them.
She’s gonna learn one of these days, In sha Allah.
The white race is a race of devils.
But I don’t waste time on “rusty locks.”
SO
I
THINK
I’M
GOING
TO
GO
TO
WALMART
Smelling like Love Allah
AND
Just try and leave with a fabulous new bike
(Lulu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😥 😥 😥 )
That’ll make traveling easier
So, I can get my clothes
Wash them
And push to the hotel.
PRAY
Everything goes well for me today,
Brothers and Sisters
And May Our Saviour Allah, Who Came in the Divine Person of Master Fard Muhammad, To Whom Praises Are Due Forever, Bless Each One Of You With MONEY, A GOOD HOME and FRIENDSHIP IN ALL WALKS OF LIFE upon your submission to HIM.
Remember to seek HIS GUIDANCE in EVERYTHING YOU DO.
Say, “Allah Do You Want Me To Do This First or That?” “Allah Do You Want Me To Go Here First or There?”
And you can’t go wrong.
If you seek His Guidance in EVERYTHING you do, you cannot go astray.
On Monday, when I parked Lulu, I tried to hide her because, as you can see, she’s stunning. And, I’ve caught would-be thieves eyeing her hungrily.
So, I always made sure she was securely locked up, especially after the first day I bought her and thought somebody stole her because I had failed to scramble the code on her lock.
Turns out I just forgot where I parked her. SMH
So, Tuesday, when I left, Allah TOLD me to GET HER, but I didn’t.
I didn’t feel like going to where I had parked her.
I didn’t think I was going far.
Allah Said “Get Her.”
But I disobeyed.
I ended up being gone for two days.
WALKING.
And when I went to go check on her last night
SHE WAS GONE!!!
I felt really sad
Because she was so unique.
I’ll never find another like her.
But Allah Told me to go to Walmart tomorrow
When I get my check
And buy another bike.
I was thinking maybe I don’t need one since I walked for two days.
But that is just because
I didn’t have far to go.
Allah Also Told Me That The Person(s)
Who Took Her Really Needed Her.
And luckily it happened
Right when I’m getting some more money!
*****
So, I never saw the Brother, who said he was going to get me a hotel, again.
I feel like it was a trick to get me to stay in the Library.
Voodou, you know.
They’ve been after me since I went to jail in 2014
Our Beloved Messenger (May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah forever be upon him) Taught us, in How To Eat To Live, that the money you think you are saving by buying cheap foods will only go to the doctor or pharmacist or UNDERTAKER!
So, eat the best of foods.
But I digress
No Lulu
And one more day til I get my check.
****
So, last night I found a new HONEYCOMB HIDEOUT
And everything was Gucci until Security came in around 3
And made me leave.
I hurried up and got out of there
AND
Right before I hit the exit
He goes,
“Wait! Before you leave…
“Do you have any…”
I knew he was going to ask for my I.D.
So, I acted like
I couldn’t hear him
AND
Practically ran out the door
Without stopping
And especially without turning around.
You can’t put me in jail
For trespassing
If you can’t catch me!
****
So, I found a bathroom
And locked myself in
Until Sunrise
Then an employee
Knocked on the door
SO
I hurried up
AND
Wrapped up what I was writing
AND
Pushed to another
SPOT.
IT WAS LIKE A LOBBY
AND
I
SAW
A
YOUNG
BLACK
COUPLE
SLEEPING ON EACH OTHER
On one of the couches.
SO
I
WAS
TRYING
TO CHILL
UNTIL
THE LIBRARY OPENED UP
BUT THEN I SAW THIS DEVIL
WHO
Worked there and I knew she wanted to make us leave
BUT
She was scared
To say something
And went back to her desk.
WELL
I was not about to sit there and wait for Security
To show up
Cause you Know she called them.
SO
I
PUSHED
TO YET ANOTHER
HONEYCOMB HIDEOUT
It was about 7:30
And I thought the Library opened at 9:30
I didn’t find out about this new spot
UNTIL
I
HAD
BEEN
SITTING
IN
THE
LOBBY
FOR
A
MINUTE
So, I just rested and slept a little more
Then pushed
(without LuLu 😥 )
To The Library
****
So, I see this Brother
Drinking
So, naturally, I tell him to stop
He seemed so moved by my show of concern
We talked for about half an hour
He told me his father died yesterday
And he had just lost his job this morning.
I just gave him the best news I could
AND
Told him to read
Message To The Blackman In America.
I see him outside now.
I think he was trying to play me though.
Everybody out here has a sad story
They tell you to try and get your sympathies
And trust
So they can con you.
It usually involves a dead parent.
But I met a Sister with H.I.V. too
****
So, after I left him
I went to the door of the Library
But they weren’t open yet
And there was a Brother
Dressed like a woman
In a big floppy hat, long skirt
And carrying two purses.
SO
I
GO
UP
TO
HIM
And Start Talking To Him
I asked him what is he doing with that skirt on?
It’s some woman out there that’s supposed to be wearing it.
I told him he’s a man.
Men are supposed to wear pants.
That’s the difference between men and women.
Men wear pants.
Women wear long skirts.
Haven’t you heard the term
“I wear the pants in this house?”
He laughed and I could tell I was getting through to him.
So, this Christian lady decides to jump in
And mess everything up
And starts telling him he reminded her of some fag she grew up with
And how he could sew anything and whatnot.
And I was like,
“You can’t sew?“
And she said she could hem pants and sew on a button
BUT
“Sexy” could sew ANYTHING!
I said
“So, can I!”
“You can too!
“Black women were CREATED to sew, cook, clean, take care of babies and our husbands…”
She was like
“We can do more than that.”
I was like, “Yeah, but that’s what we were CREATED to do.”
So, basically we got in to this HEATED discussion about gender roles
And you know that’s one of my favorite subjects.
After going back and forth for a while
I finally figured out
She didn’t want to lower her standard of living to let her husband provide for her.
She kept talking about how educated she was and makes plenty money.
So, I’ve been procrastinating about writing this blog long enough.
I just didn’t have anything to write about and when I write it gives the enemy clues to my whereabouts so they can trail me.
But Allah is Sufficient.
I got to Facebook and help some Brothers who are mistakenly following leaders other than The Honourable Elijah Muhammad (May the Peace and the Blessings of Allah forever be upon him).
But you know, now that I’m writing, I feel one thousand per cent better.
Razzaq was telling me to write all morning.
But, like I said, I didn’t have anything to write about.
It feels so good to be out in The New Orleans weather.
It rained last night and I didn’t even know.
Master Fard Muhammad, To Whom Praises are due forever, keeps me sheltered without me even being aware. Al Hamdulillah!
So cheah.
It’s the end of the month and I’m just trying to make it until I get my check on Friday without being caught.
I mean, jail would mean shelter and three meals, but they make me take off my headpiece. Both jail and the hospital.
That’s the only reason why I don’t want to go.
That and I probably would have to buy another laptop and iphone.
Police steal.
I never get my stuff back.
They stole two hundred dollars from me the first time I got arrested.
I had a tablet TWICE that I never saw again.
They steal in the hospital too.
I had twenty dollars in my purse the last time I went in, but when I got out, no duckets.
So, I’m just going to try and persevere.
I had a loaf of bread, some cream cheese and capers that I hid yesterday because I didn’t want to carry it around with me and this morning when I went to go get it (I really wanted to eat too) it was gone.
But Allah is Razzaq.
I survived three months here last year with nothing.
I was just about to say, It’s just BORING and then I look out the window and see white puffs racing across the sky. I’ve never seen clouds travel as quickly as they do in New Orleans. It’s amazing.
New Orleans is so romantic.
Especially at night.
But I heard somebody got killed on Bourbon Street this weekend. And nine people were injured in a shootout.
They say Bayou Classic is one of the most dangerous times in New Orleans.
Apparently some Brothers who had beef ran into each other but neither one of them got injured.
I rode by and saw how lit it was. I mean they had streets blocked off so cars couldn’t go down them and there were Black folks er’wherr, and I love that, but something kept me from going in. Al Hamdulillah!
I guess I’ll buy another loaf of bread and try and keep it this time.
The Messenger (May the peace and the blessings of Allah forever be upon him) taught us that bread and milk are our best foods. Or bean soup and bread. So, I’ll get some more cream cheese and that can be my “milk” LOL
It’s just SO peaceful where I am right now and peace is HARD to come by in this wicked world, so I’m hesitant to leave.
Maybe when my battery runs out…
It’s so HOT today.
This weather is bananas.
But I’d rather be hot than cold.
I was thinking about telling Keyvin about one of my HONEYCOMB HIDEOUTS that I hate. But I would hate to have to go there one day and have to try and kick him out. So, sorry Key, that would not be a good look. Take the road less traveled and find your own spots.
Compared to the weekend I had, today was very boring.
I got up, typed my blog, then decided to wash my cloak (which is filthy due to me sleeping on it in less than habitable places) but my laundry pod thingies were locked in the masjid along with my shampoo, Ivory Aloe and white washcloth among other things.
So, since my funds are kinda low, I decided to go pick up the pods instead of buying more.
I get there and, of course, it’s locked.
But that’s never stopped me.
I hopped the gate and found Brother Muhammad doing groundswork.
He’s cool. I think he’s like one of the Believers who just went along with the Sunni Hypocrites to stay alive. So, we get along real good.
He didn’t trip about me hopping the fence and I got to watch him do “man work.”
That’s my favorite pasttime. 😉
I just love watching Blackmen work!
They could be cooking, doing construction, yardwork, carpentry, electrical work, playing music, performing surgery, teaching a class or anything manual. I don’t think sitting at a desk, pushing papers or typing on a keyboard would be as interesting. Then again, if it’s the right Brother……. 😉 ❤ ❤ ❤
So, this car pulls up and it’s the Brother who always comes for Zhuhr and sits in the car until the Muezzin unlocks the door.
So, me and Mr. Muhammad are not really paying him any attention but his presence is felt.
So, Razzaq tells me that he has the key.
And after another Brother shows up and leaves, he gets out of the car and unlocks the door!
I was like, Mm, mm, mm. SMH
This nigga is probably the one who kicked me out.
Sitting there like he’s nobody.
But you can’t fool a Muslim nowadays.
So, I go around to the back door, so I won’t have to hop the fence again and Mr. Muhammad had just come out, so I go get my stuff and leave.
I go around the corner and these Brothers were working on the street and you know very well, I like watching Brothers hard at work. So, I stopped and we watched each other.
Then I saw the Sister who told me about the vacant houses in the neighborhood. She said she has THREE houses. I told her I just need one. And that I had tried to get in one of the houses she told me about but I really don’t like hopping fences. I’m trying to be a LADY and chill on hopping fences and climbing in and out of windows and whatnot. Sometimes it’s such a hassle, waiting for somebody to open the door for me. But I’m a QUEEN in training, so I gotta leave the little girl stuff to the little girls. Even though that’s more little boy stuff LOL
So, she tells me that that gate is unlocked. And I was like What? I don’t remember there even being a gate. But she was walking in that direction, so I reluctantly left the men and followed her. Shelter is important.
So, she tells me that the owner next door to the house is her Brother-in-Law and I could just tell him I’m homeless, so don’t call the Po-Pos on me.
But I hate being dependent on anyone other than my Razzaq, so I didn’t say anything.
I feel like they’re trying to trap me.
The house was right next door to the little Brother I spoke to for two hours the other day and he was outside when we rolled up but he went in after they spoke like he didn’t want to have anything to do with me. At least not helping me. Even though that was how we met. He asked if I needed any help.
I feel like if I ask them not to say anything they’re going to feel like I owe them and I ain’t the one.
Not to mention, that little Brother was talking about Voodou a bit much for my taste and Idk, I could climb through that open window (which happens to be the ONLY house I’ve ever seen in New Orleans that had an open window. All of the other windows, even in inhabited houses, are boarded up) and never come back out. Next thing you know, they’ll be using my skull for some type of Voodou ritual. IJS
So, I went back to the Brothers working on the street and gave them my fliers.
Then, let me think….
Oh yeah, I remembered another little wash house. I’m not even gonna call it a laundromat. SMH
I don’t know why they don’t have more laundromats in New Orleans.
The only thing I can attribute it to is what I was talking about earlier, how everybody gets paid, so they probably all have washers and dryers.
When you finally find one, in the hood, they are the jankiest ramshackle broken-down machines and they cost so much!!!
In L.A., I used to get upset when they charged $1.50. Most are $1.25 to wash and .25 to dry. Yes, one quarter to dry.
Out here, you can pay $3.50 just to wash and another $3.50 to dry!
I used to do a whole weeks laundry in L.A. for $6.00.
In NOLA, I can barely do one load for that much.
And having only two changes of clothes, I have to do laundry EVERY DAY.
When I have my own place it’s no big deal because I can handwash and air dry.
But being homeless…
Try finding a sink where they don’t trip….
Al Hamdulillah, I’ve been pretty lucky.
So, anyway, I try this new wash house, and it’s just as janky as the other one I found in the hood and there’s nobody there and no change machine.
BUT
There are outlets!
So, I just start charging my laptop.
This Mexican lady comes in and does a load and I ask about the units because it’s in an apartment complex.
She doesn’t like me at first, but I win her over with my wit and charm.
She tells me who manages the property but it’s some big corporation and I don’t like those, so after she leaves I remember there’s a phone number on a sign outside and called it. But, alas, it just redirected to the big corporation.
Razzaq’s way of telling me he wants me homeless.
So, I’m in there just chillin’, listening to my music and this Brother comes in asking could he look in the garbage for some empty bottles.
I was like, What? It’s not MY garbage!
But, he just wanted to talk to me.
We talked for a good hour, and I think he just wanted some blessings because he was a singer and I’m good friends with Allah and also really into music.
He also told me about his love life and I gave him some wisdom.
But, he is a diehard Christian, so I don’t know about him…
After my laptop and phone were fully charged, I shook.
Went and got something to eat. Ate and came to the library where I am now and they’re about to close.
)
Homemaking For The Black Muslim Woman Journal ™ 